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It's Fine She's Fine

🕑 Added 2025-02-18 01:38:37 +0000 UTC

Comments

Clifton Royston

I just want to say all of the patrons here are such a good group of humans. So many people opening up and showing real personal vulnerability and not a single mean-spirited comment.

Clifton Royston

[slow clap]

Clifton Royston

@Corvus I hear you. I have been pleasantly surprised the last few years to see more people feeling safe to be "out" as multiple systems in some contexts. Right off the bat I can think of 3 multiples I'm casual friends with on Mastodon, including Irenes who actually wrote a guide on how to come out as multiple at work.

Wednesday

So, again, not a professional, just a person who’s been through some stuff and did too much reading? But I thought about it, and that still sounds like fighting to me. You couldn’t fight physically, but you pushed back how you could: by making your feelings known. There are a lot of ways to fight back. But it could have been freezing in a way — you’re the only one who knows what you were experiencing when that happened.

Opus the Poet

There's also Amber/Amazi Girl over on Dumbing of Age, a system who we have seen go uncooperative and gradually start communicating again. One of the funnier things was AG complaining about Amber's method of getting to sleep and that she (AG) was usually the one left cleaning up the mess.

Corvus Cardia

This is the only place on the interwebs we’ve considered as “safe” (such as this exists today) to be a little open. Long time lurker(s) ha Edit to add: solidarity fist bump 💕 Edit 2: because the world Jeph has built is the one we all need and deserve, so those who comment here are the actual good people.

alphanor

If ever there was a situation where Hanners would break down and give a hug, this should be it!

Clifton Royston

Love to all 3 of you, because I know a little too much of what you’re talking about.

Clifton Royston

Probably TMI but oh well. Seems like lots of people here who know what I’m getting at.

Clifton Royston

Honestly, as someone with a long history of dissociation, it is usually a bad way to deal with things. Once you get the habit it can all too easily become the way you react to anything unpleasant or threatening. But sometimes it’s the only thing you’ve got and you’ve got to use it. (Especially when you are young or stuck in a powerless situation.)

least_rectangles

It was "fight" when I could actually fight back. Before that, it was "scowl and glare contemptuously because I'm too small to fight back". Is that freezing or fawning?

ValdVin

There's never an Elliott around when you need him!

Elf Sternberg

Oh, Winslow is such a cinnamon roll! You don’t want his name associated with something like orbital bombardment.

William Burns

If the rude caller has a Southern accent, be sure to work the phrase "Well, bless your heart" (in an affectionate tone of voice) into the conversation after they say something nasty.

BookBeard

Back in my call center days I usually just entertained myself in those situations by silently making rude gestures at the phone. Or non-silently, if you are feeling confident in your mute button skills.

Kuragari

Is dissociating a good way to deal with things? Because sometimes I'm not sure what to do when someone is really rude on the phone. I can't tell them off because I like my job.

Corvus Cardia

Friends/(maybe) family are those at ground zero when these things happen; we’re grateful for the Hanners in our life, for sure.

Merle Blue

I wish Willow weren't relatable.

enchantedsleeper

Take care of yourself ❤️❤️❤️❤️

enchantedsleeper

Ha, I can't remember what I got but it was definitely sus 😅 I can fortunately switch to Reader mode to avoid them but it makes the experience of navigating the site less optimal. I wonder why the site seems to be so afflicted. It can't be a great experience for non-Patreon readers...

Yelling Bird

It has it's moments.

Stephen Wells

It's partly about tenses and partly about aspect (many languages differentiate completed vs. incomplete actions separately from tense!)

Stephen Wells

Nice of Hanners to demonstrate in practice how to Point Fingers At in panel 2 :)

Josh Moberly

Ah geez, I've been at this level of dissociation before. Someone get Willow a good trauma therapist, stat!

legobil

Oh god. I missed the last Willow comic and the whole dissociation. Willooooooooow. 😩😩😩

Melissa

Been dissociating a lot lately. The flood is real. Thanks, Jeph - QC is an important part of my days. 💜

Corvus Cardia

For a DID system, Moonknight, particularly as depicted in the series, is a powerful representation. We’ve since had family watch it to help them understand a bit about us and our world. We’re very fortunate though because we’re (now) aware of each other and have a toolbox of coping mechanisms (yay therapy!).

Dylan T

Oh this one hits a little *too* close. This hurt my feelings a little. Oh no

David Paul

You too, enchantedsleeper? I love QC, but the pop-ups that are showing are definitely questionable (it's porn, basically).

Boots McGoot

aaa oh no oh love 🥺

Shannon Woodbury

...You chose your avatar perfectly.

Shannon Woodbury

In my experience: If you feel like you've just woken up (despite the fact you were already awake) and you can't recall anything from the last few minutes, then it's time to call your therapist. (NB: In the Marvel series Moon Knight, the Writers / Director actually got it pretty much spot on....)

Chris Godsey

Did NOT see the emotional backlash I'd feel reading through Willow's recent trauma. Seems to be a worrying self-indicator there that I feel a dire need to duck away from for some reason...

Shannon Woodbury

Cue up the "Flight of the Valkyries / Carmina Burana" play list folks.... cause here comes Iris!! (D-Types can always intuit when their little one's in trouble).

Opus the Poet

So, you want the Banner in She-Hulk? Because that's how you get Hulk as a separate personality. Hulk is an alter.

Maximum Turtle

That’s how it goes. Sometimes it comes out empty, sometimes it comes out shaky. But if you’re new to it chances are you’ll cry

enchantedsleeper

I forgot that happened xD Also, I'm getting some nasty pop-ups on the QC site...

Philip Masters

I like the idea of Willow Chaneling anger. It presumably involves spraying someone in the eyes with expensive perfume while wearing an LBD.

enchantedsleeper

What should Hanners be doing instead? (As in, what is the 'correct' response in this situation?)

enchantedsleeper

She's doing her best as Willow's friend 😅

Carrie

My favourite version of fine: Freaked out, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional.

Carrie

For myself I am not present when I have disassociated so suddenly it's a different time and place and I don't know how or why I am where I am.

Hakurei06

Look, I’m not saying Iris is right. I’m saying i’d help her hide the bodies.

SpookyPenguin

I came to comment , I am seeing Iris in a new light that i was not expecting from this angle, this would be carer burnout you could not imagine.

Krestus

Noooo Willow :( she needs a hug

Katrina Urmson

Willoooooooooow! 😭

angrytoast777

willow need's a vacation

Davus Otho

How does one stop dissociating and how do i know once I've done it? (Seriously asking)

Uniquitous

Poor Willow. Too pure for this world.

Wednesday

I wish you had never had to experience that. We currently understand there to be four broad classes of trauma reaction: fight (as you experienced), flight (run! run now! get away!), freeze (stop moving, dissociate, lose executive function, everything slows to a crawl), or fawn (placate, please, bring calm back by folding). Everyone is capable of any of them, but factors such as upbringing and cultural expectations will encourage us to adopt defaults, especially if we learn they’re effective at getting us through incidents which activate those responses in us. Note: I am not a trained medical or mental health professional, and this is an overview from memory.

Andrew

Lemon is outside the shop, waiting for the perfect ‘slightly too late’ moment.

Clifton Royston

My wife used to have many explications of FINE, including F**ing Insane, Neurotic, and Excitable.

Clifton Royston

Oof.

Grace Kieser

Dissociating the peasants and their THATCHED ROOF COTTAGES!

Grace Kieser

She may not be a therapist, but she's spent most of her life in therapy and has a fair amount of personal experience with emotional abuse.

Minzoku Bokumetsu

totally not what my first time in therapy was like for me

Minzoku Bokumetsu

oh no

Maurice Kessler

My ghods, that's heartbreaking.

Opus the Poet

Release the (v)Iris.

Opus the Poet

That's what they keep telling me.

Opus the Poet

Or the straightjacket and padded cell.

least_rectangles

It's a weird sort of relatability for me. I've been abused as a kid, but my response was to just get angry and to fight back when I was finally able to. I sympathize with Willow for the most part (because the world needs optimistic, cheerful people who aren't bitter old cynics like me) but part of me felt slightly contemptuous at how... servile her attitude was. It being a coping mechanism makes a bit more sense.

Miyaa

No, the last thing we need is a vigilante robot telling dad jokes as she kills her targets.

Opus the Poet

Sounds pretty normal to me. You must have a boring life. I wonder what that's like?

Miyaa

I’m not sure if the Coffee of Doom even has paper clips.

Opus the Poet

BTDT 😢

BookBeard

An AI covered in blood and guts startling someone prone to dissociation and causing them to faint? I dunno, that seems like a pretty far-fetched scenario... https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=3897

Andrea Andrew

Protect Willow at all costs!

AlexKorobeiniki

Eh, it’s not like Hanners is some emotional wizard herself. She’s come a long way but it wasn’t so long ago that she’d be the one in the chair.

Dale Nielsen

Sorry, that is not the current password.

Anthony Gaglianese

When that reality wall hits like an hour later....yeah, that's rough.

Chauncey

The people that resulted in Willow being hit with a bolster. The latter… I’m not sure if any individual/group could be held accountable for that. While violence — Not strictly physical. Violence takes many forms and varies in degree— is sometimes necessary to protect yourself, I think that is better addressed through community and therapy. Willow, the beacon of positivity and good vibes that she is, has been wounded long before that bolster ever entered the scene. I can only hope that she gets the help she needs to heal. And, a group of friends prepared to support and fight for her might be a start.

Sean Brannon

Hanners has grown so much <3 I was just reading some of the early strips with her, and she's really blossomed since her earlier issues. I would take life advice from Hanners at this point!

Cole Blackblood

Aww Willow :( Ayo, come hug her for Hanners!

Joel Bateman

I need to hug her like right now

Daryl Sawyer

But upon whom? The people who threw a pillow at her? Or the people who instilled in her an abject terror of holding others responsible for the wrong they have done to her?

JCfromNC

I feel like Iris would definitely lean more into The Punisher. Batman's core belief is supposed to be that he doesn't want to see any more innocents hurt, and that doesn't feel like Iris' vibe.

Taigan

Not sure if I prefer picturing Iris as Batman or The Punisher.

Joseph Bonnar

Are you suggesting we send Iris to walk the path of vengeance? I could agree with that.

Chauncey

Droid 06: “I just like to fight.”

Carl

Your life sounds a lot more exciting than mine.

Joseph Bonnar

Could we add Droid 06 to the mix? Please?

Joseph Bonnar

I don't know if you have stopped or not. I don't even know if I've stopped dissociating myself!

Jenea Ylinen Fredrickson

Oof, I've been there. You think you're good but 😭😭😭

Chauncey

I’m looking to send a message, not remove someone from the census. That’s why Bubbles is there to manage the chaos. Iris is the danger. Bubbles is there to manage. Crushbot is there for intimidation/snacks. Elliot is there strictly for himbo vibes. And Faye is there for the mental beat down..

nbarnes

Like many things, you get better at it with practice.

Ursus Ridens

Wait -- have _I_ stopped dissociating?

Todd Ellner

Dissociation is a powerful defense mechanism

Yelling Bird

I too follow a path of forgiveness. It has it's limits though. Last time I broke from it I had to kick the ass of a coked-up bass player at a party thrown by a dominatrix friend of mine. Trust me, he earned it.

David Durant

Brun and her harpoon seem to be missing from this list.

Edward Clayton Andrew

Is it Zen or is she in shock?

Chauncey

I’d invite Yay and Hannelore. But, that would likely leave the block the fight takes place on looking like the aftermath of an Avengers battle.

Chauncey

Why do I feel the need to fight a fictional character? That’s it. I’m assembling a team. Iris, Bubbles, Crushbot, Elliot, and Faye. We must avenge our precious Willow.

Taigan

In a worse comic, Willow would dissociate a whole different personality that would Chanel all the anger she doesn’t let herself feel. In this one, she has Iris for that.

Sean Kinlin

You're saying Willow is Batty?

Miyaa

Thank goodness it wasn’t Lemon or the lesser known Kumquat.

BookBeard

Certainly that is not an ideal approach to someone having a dissociative episode, and I'm sure with the benefit of hindsight Hanners would agree, but in fairness she only fully realized what was happening in the last panel.

Kenneth Carlile

I read it that way the first time, but going back and reading the last 2 strips (in this sequence) and then this one, I don't think Hanners is pushing hard. Willow said it was her fault, and that is not something that she should be taking on.

Phaine Of Catz

Hanners is not a therapist and Willow is exhibiting very concerning behavior. I don't think Hanners had the right approach, but I can't blame her for not realizing right away...

JMK

Willow! My heart…

Miyaa

Nuuu

BookBeard

Someone is dissociating? *wall busts open* "LEMON TO THE RESCUE!" https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=4351

Richard

Am I the only one with a sliver of anger at Hanners pushing so hard on this??

Miyaa

Tomorrow: NOW Iris comes in, bloodied, dented, and happy but then sees Willow crying and just storms out again. Ayo, naturally, faints again.

BookBeard

*Dora runs in* "Cantilever! Cantilever!"

Melissa Wilson

Make it so!

Melissa Wilson

OooOOOoooh…. FINE! Now I see. 💡

schmod

"Station. Requesting orbital bombardment. Authorization Winslow two two"

Dean Reilly

Feelings In Need of Expression.

Jose Alfredo Villalobos

Dig a grave for that poor man.

djellafine

Oof

BookBeard

A tense moment indeed.

Mad Marie

Later, Bubbles: "Why is my chair....wet?" Willow: "I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. A marriage on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched bolsters glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like my tears in your chair."

Ashlyn Crowe

You're supposed to STOP dissociating?!

Doug DeJulio

I feel like if this goes much farther, Station might "accidentally" drop something.

Nilbog Trog

One of those moments where tenses are *extremely* helpful

Holly Nelson

Oh honey child.

David Neale-Lorello

💔

SpazzyC

Someone give her a hug!!!

A Dark Planet, Lit By No Sun

Been there.

Doc Gumby

It's time...

Melissa Wilson

Maybe I developed a unique connotation for the word, but I think this is quite possibly the opposite of “fine…”

Logan Nix

call Iris!!!!

TheCaptainTrout

Scarily relatable indeed

Sean Kinlin

Weeping Willow ☹️ 😢

Doc Gumby

They made Willow cry. NOW we can unleash Iris!

SilverbackRon

Poor Willow! 💖

AlexKorobeiniki

Oh hey, i’ve done that before! Man, she probably should’ve gone home cause there’s prolly gonna be some turbulence upon re-entry

Darth Hypno

I love you Jeph for writing something so fine and personal. I dislike you strongly for being so accurate about trauma and delayed stress responses that it's reminding me of my past. Thank you for making this comic.