jephjacques patreon

Dig Two Graves

🕑 Added 2025-02-13 01:34:55 +0000 UTC

Comments

Clifton Royston

Excuse me, Anh is not begging - not even for petting on the head and being called good girl!

Clifton Royston

Thanks for the specific link! I used to quote that particular dialogue at every opportunity.

Joe

I knew it sounded familiar!!

Maurice Kessler

That face in panel 2, right there. Hanners has seen it before.

Jason Leonard

Just saw the spicy stuff and I am glad I upgraded.

Doc Gumby

How about a nice maiming spree instead? You can have more victims that way!

Opus the Poet

Well that's also the level that gets you the spicy stuff. Jeph does good spicy stuff.

William Cole

Iris seems more fun of stabbing than smashing.

AlexKorobeiniki

Willow is the kind of person who could use a threatening friend. Just someone nearby who takes it upon themselves to maintain the boundaries that Willow seems… kinda bad at maintaining? Not Iris. You don’t want someone who will actually break a chair over someone’s head.

enchantedsleeper

Isn't Willow already pretty chilled? 🤔

Jason Leonard

I upgraded to the 10 a month, I have been reading your comic since the early 2000s and I upgraded to the 10 a month only because I love it and wanted to give you more per month.

BookBeard

It was a riff on the comic @William Cole was referencing: https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=2443

Opus the Poet

@ Ubiquitous I have that book, the "defaced" edition.

Joe

@Miyaa Iris, correct me if I'm wrong but they're gonna lock me up & throw away the key ...

Joe

@Carrie - oh this one I like!!

Joe

@BookBeard, that seems like a specific reference, but I can't place it. help??

Joe

Boot to the Head! (SH-ZOOMP!)

Joe

get 2 graves ready ... my mistake ... 3 graves. didn't expect Jeph to go all spaghetti western on us ...

BookBeard

Aw, let her have *one* vengeful killing spree. Just a little one, as a treat? She's been very good this month.

Hugh Eckert

Now I'm going to imagine Iris with a Scottish accent. Works for me.

Hugh Eckert

Origin is Kurosawa's "Yojimbo": "Cooper. Two coffins... No, maybe three." Kurosawa said about AFFOD: "a fine movie, but it was *my* movie"

Hugh Eckert

Reminds me of the Pintsize "Now Ends The Age Of Man" joke comic.

legobil

If Marten has a chill aura, does Willow exude chill?

legobil

I can only guess which of these categories Iris pushes Willow towards.

Halloween Jack

Iris is... THE YOGAVENGER

Miyaa

And then Iris transforms into a magical sailor scout.

Grace Kieser

That's a DEEP cut!

BookBeard

"Ma'am, there was another incident at the yoga studio." "It's time then." "A... are you certain ma'am?" "Yes. Release the Iris."

ValdVin

Gorb is the Jager with the bad plan, and Minsk (I think) is the one who wants to nip it in the bud. https://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20031017

kupo

Or she digs no graves... because there's no need for them if no one ever finds the bodies...

Uniquitous

Just remember, if violence wasn't your last resort, you failed to resort to enough of it.

Andrew

No one has yet dared ask Iris to turn down the terminator theme music during her morning routine

Melissa Wilson

Pleasure doing business with you, Shannon! I can only assume you like to share even more than I do. 😉

Melissa Wilson

1000% here for the live action film of this. Where do I find the Kickstarter?

legobil

Talking through trauma when it just about happend? Yeah I can see that being a bit triggering. Oh Willow.

Boots McGoot

willow's hanging out with the right people. she'll either learn to assert herself, or ascend to a plane of pure chill

David Paul

Depends on how good you are at juggling.

enchantedsleeper

I didn't know Yay moonlighted as a lawyer 🤔

Stephen Wells

"Walking the path of vengeance" is a very specific kind of tai chi routine for Iris.

SheepFace2000

When Iris sets out for revenge on someone she digs two graves. One for each half of the person she’s about to rip in two.

Opus the Poet

Only if she gets caught.

Opus the Poet

There are very few problems that can't be solved with the proper amount of C4. The "proper" amount might be in the multiple tons but the problem will be solved.

Opus the Poet

You really think you would be able to use 5 torches?

Opus the Poet

Just a "little"? If I was that chill, North Central Texas would be in a new Ice Age.

8-Bit Archer

Now I can't help but imagine Iris actually being at the shop's door in silhouette followed by the spider verse prowler sound effect...

Dean Reilly

Iris has made more than one enemy for life!

Smashy smashy

Anh would beg to differ

Byron Wright

I like that Hannelore can still meet her "Why are you so nonchalant about this" quota even if Martin isn't around, thank goodness Willow followed him to the shop one day like a lost dog which is how I assume she's gotten into every situation.

Joseph

Willow being just a little too chill

Fart Captor

How DARE

William Cole

This is how "Release the virus!" happens.

BookBeard

Wait, so Yay would be repping the person that hit Willow?

Packy Anderson

Canadian humor at its best.

Darnel D Cooper

Sounds like a Jager I know,....Ognian? is that you?

Drazi

Let us meditate...

Emma Humphries

This would be a good time for Yay to show up and rep that clown’s wife pro-bono to take everything.

BookBeard

Nah, that place is totally overhyped. An 8.0 dump site at best. https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1476

Shannon Woodbury

I'll take ten thanks.

Shannon Woodbury

Dunno what Iris is gonna do about all this. But be it surprising or not, I suspect either way, her response is going to be thesis-worthy.

Carrie

But with enough thermite zero graves still works.

Joseph Bonnar

"You missed. You too shall be honored to learn a lesson here".

BookBeard

Heh, tittibasana.

Mr. Ifrit

Cyberpunk Frieren soudns awseom.

Doc Gumby

Fade in on Iris standing in the rubble, silhouetted against the sunset, headband blowing in the hot wind, her katana gleaming in the red light...

Melissa Wilson

Truly, we are in the presence of greatness. Donna, we salute you!

BookBeard

[scene opens on the charred ruins of a yoga studio] "Northampton, 2029 A.D. 3 billion human lives ended on that day. The survivors of the nuclear fire called it The Tsundere Vengeance. They lived only to face a new nightmare, the war... against Iris."

Yelling Bird

I sure hope Iris wasn't built by Cyberdine...

Captain Button

She is using her psionic powers to do, ummm, something.

JCfromNC

Phil & Kaja Foglio's "Girl Genius". "Uh-huh. And how do dose alvays end?" "De dirigible iz in flames, everyboddyz dead, an' I've lost my hat." "Dot's right! Und any plan vere you lose your hat iz?" "A bad plan?" "Right again!"

Sean Kinlin

Jaegers. (The reference is to the comic Girl Genius)

Packy Anderson

"Yes, Master, I have learned two things. First, anger is a weapon only to ones opponent." "Very good." "Second… get in the first shot."

Bridgette Ryan

No, that is a quote from Girl Genius.

BookBeard

Indeed, Willow and Iris once walked the path of vengeance together, in their epic struggle against Empress Stabula XIV. https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=4730

Melissa Wilson

Buy two, get a torch for free!🔥

Chauncey

I feel like Willow shares any more stories like that, Hannelore will have to use that orbital railgun.

Doc Gumby

Line starts here, get yet pitchforks, only five dollars!

Claudia D.

Nah, let Iris have "the talk" with that couple…

Claudia D.

Tortura?

JMK

Forget Iris!! I’m walking the path of vengeance!! Nobody hurts Willow!!

dizzy ditzy

Just tell Iris that willow needs to be cuddled and refuse to elaborate

Grace Kieser

Willow. Sweetie. There's pacifist and then there's just passive. You are too far towards the latter. Sometimes violence is the correct answer when people are being violent towards you!

ValdVin

"Dis is turningk into vun of dose plans. Hyu know--De kind vere ve keel everybody dot notices dot ve's killin' people?"

Captain Button

Forever after will it Dominate Your Destiny.

Captain Button

I hear there is a good quarry nearby...

Sean Kinlin

@Donna: [applause]

Magic Chopstick Games

OMG

Not that Patrick Foltz

Thinking the same thing.

Ben R

Stuff like this...any of this...wouldn't happen if Iris attended Willow's classes as an "observer". Then again, class attendance might deteriorate rapidly.

ValdVin

And Faye knows all the abandoned quarries, then there's Hannelore's evil twin, Station wants to bring everybody to Orbital Railgun Justice... Seriously, our options are an embarrassment of riches.

Sean Kinlin

🎵Dig two graves! Dig two graves! Every time you interrupt class You'll risk some Iris blades! Dig two graves! Dig two graves!🎵

J Nauer

"My mistake. Four coffins..." --Joe (the somewhat inaccurately named "man with no name" in A Fistful of Dollars)

JoeTheCynic

Ayo (internally): Are you f***ing serious?

Phaine Of Catz

That is perhaps too zen Willow

Donna Flint

No mass graves. Everyone deserves their own plot line.

Doc Gumby

Guess Willow has to have "The Talk" with Iris again... No vengeful killing sprees!

Shawn K. Younkin

Peace was never an option.

Dorian

A non zero amount of grave

Miyaa

Now I wonder if Iris is originally from Scotland. Would explain a lot.

Ursus Ridens

It's just that Willow is devotedly pro pillow-fight. And against hitting back; that has in her past made for many very short pillow-fights.

Seth Aaron Hershman has they she pronouns

every time i look in your eyes i see st peter waaaaaaaave

Miyaa

Iris probably has a microphone/micro-camera in Willow’s glasses (like a secret version of Dale’s glasses) and Iris has probably already helped the woman knock off her ex-spouse and buried him elsewhere. I’m just saying, Iris will do anything for her partner and no robot court will ever convict her.