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Try Not To Panic

🕑 Added 2025-02-09 01:22:21 +0000 UTC

Comments

Clifton Royston

Chaotic Good with an extra shot of Chaotic

Bill Silvia

Maybe that's why she's in a bad mood.

Zig Justice

It was the least I could da.

A Normal Scarecrow

What is Cubetown then?

Stephen Wells

No, Claire is Lawful Good not Chaotic Evil.

Clifton Royston

@Mark, that's fantastic!

Clifton Royston

In the profile view of the last panel it's visible that Zlata has a very slight mid-faced protrusion even if it's not actually a nose. I've met a couple people who had noses rather similar to that, except with nostrils; I assume it's some genetic thing.

Clifton Royston

i think it's because the entire staff of Cubetown psyched themselves out about what an intimidating scary badass the Librarian was going to be before she ever got there, and are unable to see past that to the actual person of Claire.

Clifton Royston

It's always behaved like that for me, either from the emails about it or the notifications link on the Patreon web page. Kind of annoying, because sometimes I'd like to know *which* comment someone liked without an elaborate and fallible process of deduction.

Steve

Thank you! I feel like that tidbit of information has been lost in this discussion.

Opus the Poet

@Sesn I guess you forgot about Twiggy.

Opus the Poet

But she was still short.

Mikey Bear

Thank you for doing the correct amount of "da"s.

Mikey Bear

I imagine that having to explain a Special Interest That You Get Paid To Do out loud to someone who doesn't live inside your head or work alongside you is pretty nerve-wracking. For instance, I could explain EV training or shiny hunting to someone who has never played Pokemon, but I'd probably lose confidence and enthusiasm when they ask me why it matters and how it benefits the overall gameplay experience of others.

Mikey Bear

Fair, she hates when people don't clean up after themselves.

Mikey Bear

Never even occurred to me that French Horn players might be good at fisting.

Mikey Bear

Claire doesn't need an Iron Throne because nobody wants her job.

Mikey Bear

*Jam-making enthusiasts flip their table and start throwing things at the mention of "preserves" in reference to jelly and not jam*

Mikey Bear

I think Claire would like to be less intimidating, and an expensive engraved nameplate would be counter to that.

Mikey Bear

Crazy to think this Tai/Momo moment was more than 3000 comics ago and Momo already had her human-sized body.

Mikey Bear

Moray is helping. :)

Mikey Bear

I was imagining Claire opening with, "So, what does your department do?" and the interviewee just imploding immediately, with the AI next to her being all, "Oh don't worry about her, she does this every time she is perceived/spoken directly to."

A Normal Scarecrow

I'm getting a little worried that Claire is Elon Musking/DOGE-ing Cubetown.

Stephen Wells

She knows how to delegate!

Stephen Wells

Claire said "Hello" and "Do you need any help?" and "Are you OK?" and "...really, are you OK?"

BookBeard

Yep. The android notifications still sends me to the specific comment, but the in-app notification list just takes me to the top of the comments section.

Opus the Poet

Has anyone else had a problem with the notification not sending you to the comments you're getting notifications about? Because all I'm getting is sent to the comments about the page I was commenting on.

Ursus Ridens

A lovely view of....miles and miles of miles and miles!

Ursus Ridens

Geezoweezo, what did Clair say to the downcast lady departing her office?

Captain Button

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qC_xO2aN_IA

Elf Sternberg

As Momo can attest: https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=2037

MikeT

Laptops not on a stand to get the screen and camera at eye level make me twitch

Jim Feldman

But wait, isn't that Claire's smut?

Mark Eichin

https://harriesheder.com/project/portrait-chairs/portraitchairs/ is my image of the BiblioThrone (Mags Harries is the Boston area artist known for Glove Cycle, the bronze gloves in the T stop with all the escalators)

VC

But if you give a moose a muffin...

William Burns

For a mad moment, I thought I was in Damn You Willis's comment section.

Halloween Jack

"a real old lady who swallowed a fly"--you, uh, got a link for that?

Andrea Andrew

Woah! Is Moray about to serve Claire some cake?

prettydragoon

@Sean: Beyond a Shadow of a doubt.

Elf Sternberg

@legobil, you do get better with practice and research. Especially if you're good a field work. 😘

Bill Silvia

I'm useless without two screens when I'm dealing with data. And with two screens when my coffee hasn't arrived yet.

ValdVin

Zlata's English is really improving. Sure, words and grammar are needed, but idioms and vocal inflection are important.

William Cole

Coincidentally, Claire's next appointment is with the head of the Smut-Reading Conga Line department.

Raymond Dannelly

Not to suggest anything, but I have bongos here somewhere.

Raymond Dannelly

In CubeTown you have to pay extra for a room without a nice ocean view.

Sean Kinlin

@enchantedsleeper: At least that's a better question than "What do you want?"

Melissa Wilson

A whole new reason to shake one’s body & do that conga!

Melissa Wilson

They just don’t know how to read her… & she’s making it work to her advantage, extraordinarily well.

Summer

I love the ocean view.

legobil

You don’t have to be a decent writer to write smut. Take inspo from Marigold!

legobil

Your avatar makes that line perfect.

legobil

Maybe Marten flipped that sign, and thus forgot to flip his own sign, because a sign was already flipped?

legobil

Also, I love the “Quiet please” sign, very official looking. And then Moray put a “Don’t Panic :)” paper note with scotch tape on the door.

legobil

The fact that Claire is having ONLY a laptop speaks volumes about her efficiency.

Opus the Poet

You might want to cry into it.

Opus the Poet

Gigglesnort!

Opus the Poet

Another Rule 34 situation.

Opus the Poet

Impressed by correct use of "epithet".

Opus the Poet

(snicker)

Opus the Poet

That would be an interesting conga line.

Miyaa

I have enough problems with deep sea fish swimming up to the surface. I do not need a sentient ocean that’s pissed off with humanity.

Charles Hirst

Librarians usually don't object to smut - as long as it's properly classified/cataloged/indexed/stored/shelved etc. and sources are acknowledged.

Bagge

It seems Tai DID manage to teach the interns a few things, after all.

enchantedsleeper

My theory is that Claire only asked them one question: "Who are you?" and the existential searching prompted by that question caused that expression.

enchantedsleeper

This is why Marten doesn't flip the sign: in case an orgy breaks out inside (again). If customers come in it only makes it worse (i.e. bigger).

enchantedsleeper

"Librarian" is her job title, but "The Librarian" is her epithet.

enchantedsleeper

Cubetown is the library

enchantedsleeper

Claire is enjoying Cubetown I see xD

Stephen Wells

One day Liz will make an incredible breakthrough in fluid dynamics while trying to explain to the conga line why the "zero g bukkake" scene is implausible.

Stephen Wells

She actually just starts with "what are you doing" and "why are you doing it?" and this is enough to trigger meltdowns in half the staff.

Stephen Wells

From the process of her recruitment, it seems they actually need her to create the library, not just run one.

Stephen Wells

She's had one commissioned specially. Gradually Developing A Deep And Satisfying Relationship Of Personal Growth With The Physical Incarnation Of My Disorganised But Oddly Lovable Workplace.

Stephen Wells

At the start of volume VI of Tristram Shandy the reader is invited to sit on a pile of unsold copies of volumes I to V; the Librarian's throne is made of stacked volumes.

Stephen Wells

Static electricity. Velcro. Magnets. Superglue. Welded to her skull. Zlata takes NO chances.

Cynical Rhys

Saw "Don't Panic" mind went to Douglas Adams and started my day in a good mood

Ísabel Pirsic

Ooh, maybe The Director’s Secret Evil Plan is to turn the ocean into Solaris 🌊 😯

Am Queue

Thank you!

Sleepy John

Judging from the look on Supplicant 1 and Supplicant 2, Marten could set up a coffee station outside Claire's door and have a revenue stream like the Bay of Fundy tidal bore.

Dean Reilly

There was an old lady who swallowed a horse. She's on Onlyfans, of course.

Dean Reilly

Claire starts the meeting with a brief presentation on how awful Melvil Dewey was.

Orion Rhine

"Ook."

Joseph Bonnar

Or when Marten forgets to flip the coffee shop sign.

Elf Sternberg

The collectors edition is called: "Jelly Origins: The Preserves."

Elf Sternberg

Sean: Submit an IETF RFC!

Elf Sternberg

Darcy got there first, but I was gonna say: The experience is available if you go to the right convention.

Elf Sternberg

Graydon! I feel seen! :-) Thank you, that's so sweet.

Dagr

Smut. Reading. Conga-line. I'll take four words I never expected to see together for $200, Alex..

Bill Hately

I'm curious as to whether there is actually a library for Claire to run...

Elf Sternberg

"You may be *a* librarian, but I am *the* Librarian. The definite article, so to speak." (With apologies to Tom Baker and Terrance Dicks)

Elf Sternberg

Dammit, now my diet wants to argue with a mint chocolate chip Blizzard.

BookBeard

The "Don't Panic •⁠‿⁠•" sign says "Panic •‸•" on the other side. Moray flips it when Claire is in a bad mood.

Jose Alfredo Villalobos

Smut conga line all the way!

Noah

“Wonder twin powers: activate! Form of: conga line! Shape of: Rule 34!”

William Cole

I think it may be less her being a hardass than the shock of having to deal with any kind of accountability whatsoever.

Aditya Rameshan

If I was a decent writer, sure! 😂

William Cole

The omnibus edition is titled, "It Must Be Jelly ('Cause Jam Don't Shake Like That)".

William Cole

They all have guilty consciences.

Byron Wright

The the might imply that she would be the only one and the angering her would end up with another one appearing.

Creeperkry

If they're in a conga line reading about dicks, does that make it a D-Queue?

Andrew

If we add “first of her name” there’s plenty of room

Olaf

The "the" is implied. It's even more intimidating that way.

Andrew

Or a Literal Throne. You know, made of tear-stained grant applications.

Creeperkry

Ya know, I would have assumed Claire's sign would have said "The Librarian" instead of just "Librarian."

Carl Fink

"Someone" being you?

Bill Silvia

I don't recommend shaking it like a polaroid picture, though.

Mae.Bee

Everybody conga!!!!

Bill Silvia

Luckily, many of them have advanced degrees in addition to their BSes!

Todd Ellner

I know a young lady who swallowed my fly..... Sorry, still smut

Shane Parkey

Human Smut-ipede.

Joseph Bonnar

I'll throw money at Jeph to join THAT line.

Graydon Armstrong

https://pendorwright.com/journals/

Joseph Bonnar

Claire is not wrong.

Graydon Armstrong

Magnets.

Graydon Armstrong

And then we end up with a daisy chain.

Brian Yaras

Smut reading conga line? This is what we all subbed for!

Max Cooper

Claire! Claire! Claire! Claire!!!!

Darcy Conaty

I sat in the replica at a WorldCon, so firsthand confirmation: it IS uncomfortable.

ValdVin

"By the powers of Marigold and Amber combined..."

Michael Steamweed

I think they don't have specs yet. But Claire will get them started on that.

Michael Steamweed

Likely no "The" appended. Her surname is "Augustus". Unless the right-justification is way off, "The" won't fit.

Michael Steamweed

"Oh, just stick it inside me. I'll warm it up real fast." "Ah, no. No, we won't be doing that."

BookBeard

Last time she had it was when she was helping Clinton through his bisexual awakening. Hasn't been seen since. https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=4334

Michael Steamweed

No lumbar support.

Aditya Rameshan

This basically sounds like the set up for a foreplay daisy chain orgy situation. And now that I've said it, someone is making smut about this exact situation 😅😅😅

Michael Steamweed

We know Claire. It is, in fact, both. Those poor engineers/mathematicians/scientists gotta explain it to a non-expert. And the non-expert sees through their b.s., if they try it. And the non-expert is a hard-ass.

Michael Steamweed

Nope, it's a novel (and two movies from 1970s and 2000s). The ocean itself is sentient. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solaris_(novel)

J.R. Murdock

Smut motivates

Michael Steamweed

...Is you don't talk about Smut Club. (because you share links. all the links. no sense in telling people; just show people.)

Michael Steamweed

*applauds

Michael Steamweed

*slow claps

Michael Steamweed

Quantum friction. (it's cubetown, y'know...)

JCfromNC

"This one time, at band camp..." https://youtu.be/e-ftdcWqhUs?si=IpgmviI_qtRFwqre&t=190

Michael Steamweed

AO3? More like AO12, amirite??

Captain Button

This is Cubetown. The signs are made from Stabilized Darmstadtium (element 110).

BookBeard

It's actually the first part of a trilogy: "Jelly Origins: A Little Jelly", "Jelly Origins 2: Not Ready For This Jelly" and "Jelly Origins 3: Breaking The Mold"

BobC

Well, the first sign clipped the last few letters. The full text should be: "Quiet Pleases Me" Which provides a much better introduction to the nameplate.

Andrea Andrew

That sounds like a very wet and horny room!

Miyaa

Is that Dune?

Miyaa

It had been gone since the wedding.

Miyaa

I’m surprised neither the “Quiet Please” plaque nor the “Claire Augustus Librarian” plaque are in gold.

Polymathic Man

First rule of Smut Club...

Captain Button

Hooked around their ears.

Mad Marie

Hey question: when did Claire's nose piercing go away?

Captain Button

"When confronting The Librarian, be sure to bring your towel."

Yelling Bird

A smut reading conga line? I've gotta say, that is an intriguing idea...

Alan Groves

How did the glasses stay on if there is no nose?

Miyaa

Perhaps she’ll die small deaths.

Mad Marie

I'm really digging the equal prominence of the "Quiet Please" sign to the nameplate.

BookBeard

When you conga line dance Reading smutty romance That's A Moray!

Mad Marie

Also: alternative universe still-alive Steve Jobs looks nice with that haircolor

Mad Marie

Theory: the person in the first frame is internally relieved at the results of the meeting, but is still working on riding down from the anxiety of the anticipation prior.

Miyaa

Man I would love to have an office with a view of the Gulf of Saint Lawerence? Anticosti Island? Magdalen Islands?

Captain Button

Give me smut and nothing but a dirty novel I can't shut if it's uncut and unsut... tle -Tom Lehrer

Mad Marie

"The French Horn player stuck her entire hand...where?!"

Captain Button

Canonically, the Iron Throne is *supposed* to be uncomfortable and dangerous, because a king should never sit easy. I.e. always be alert for dangerous plots against him.

Sean Kinlin

@Abreon or Abrea: Moray got hippy in the 1960's, like everybody else.

Sean Kinlin

I wonder what the specs are for RTSP (research-to-smut protocol).

Mad Marie

"A little Jelly" is the closest English translation to the title of the manga version of the director's origin story.

Sean Kinlin

Usually people just swallow what's behind the fly.

Mad Marie

That thing looks SO uncomfortable.

Mad Marie

I call a Rule 34 on the old lady who swallowed a fly.

Sean Kinlin

Cooler than being cool

Fart Captor

Book Club for Smut

Populuxe

I’m glad we finally get to see Claire in action as The Librarian. I’ve genuinely been looking forward to this for, what? A year now? A while, anyway.

Ben R

They all know that Claire can just see through BS no matter the subject.

Sean Kinlin

For whatever reason, the view of the sea out the window makes me think of Solaris.

ValdVin

Seriously enjoying "Island of Misfit Scientists" and it's making me a little jelly.

R L

Can it be both?

Bill Silvia

I was about to mention how, as a glasses-wearer, I'm still usually the person in the room with the poorest vision due to only updating my glasses every few years while other people lack the need to update their organic eyes. Then I remembered Zlata is non-organic and lives on the Island of Misfit Scientists so she can probably see very well from the back of the line.

Andrew

No. 2 on that list: D&D Gelatinous Cube :)

Morgan Byrd

It’s just Butts Disease, it always has been

Bill Silvia

Panel 2 forces me to ask, is all of the hubbub because this is an island of neurodivergent introverts who aren't used to explaining their research to anybody outside their field, or is Claire actually being a hard-ass of a caliber we're not used to seeing from her?

ValdVin

Ya' just can't throw a smut-reading conga line together. At least this group will be in order: Zlata's the one with glasses, so she should be behind Moray.