Post "Grumpy boy snaps & pins you to the kitchen wall (m4a)" by "deepdarkaudio"

Dan D. Lyon

Yes, hi, so, since you asked; this was my subscription video. Apparently, apple geeks are my thing. Okay, uh, thanks ♡

Kat

This man is serious about his apples and it’s killing me but also so real because red delicious is an atrocity compared to like… ANY other apple

Mrs. S Dragon

Hi Deepdark. Hope all is well. Looked up a black diamond apple. Truly unique and beautiful. Not being conceited or anything like that, I consider myself a black diamond because if I don't, who will. Loved this audio. Very mmhmm and yeah❤️‍🔥

.

Drop a comment again tomorrow so I can wish you a happy bday! 🍰

Gilded in Truth

This is the audio on yt that started my deep dive into DeepDark and what a treasure trove I've found. Tomorrow is my bday and I've been feral from these audios for Days, thank you for the sexiest gift I'll be receiving this year you sinful genius you💕

Alexis

All I can say is wet

Sierra Ochoa

I listened to jealous bestie on YouTube and had to come here and listen to more 😩😍👏🏼

Sierra Ochoa

Im 16 mins in and him not letting her down and is sending meeeee omg😍🥵 shiiiii😍🥵 help lol this is my life now👏🏼

Pamela

*cracks knuckles, shifts glasses, opens chaotic notebook* Am I reading too much into this with apples and sinful pleasure as an ex mormon you bet your ass I am 😂did I fall asleep and wake up to this voice pounding the dreamscape pavement with me, yeah I did, now enjoy my cranked to 11 thoughts as follows Naga With the serpentine tongue and tail, what prey wouldn't be seduced, or dare I say hypnotized. If Creator's voice box isn't the source, can we guess the tongue then? Enchanted? Nagas are also noted to be guardians of passways/doorways, can't deny the feeling of being transported into each scenario. Need more hours in the day for research 🫡🤓💜 still believe Creator isn't completely human

June

BITCH I SAID HONEYCRISP WHO THE HELL LIKES RED DELICIOUS

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Welcome & glad it delivered 😘

Nyx

The YouTube teaser for this episode is what got me to subscribe to you on Patreon. No fucking way I could NOT hear what happened after "are you trying to cause me trouble?" ....And I was not disappointed 🔥😉

Oromara

That apple theme..? That banter? 😂 You can't convince me that this is not Caleb! (from LADS) 🤣🤣🤣 Well done! Truly well done.

Caleidoscope Cat

I can't unhear 'gabagool' like from The Sopranos.

Cutie09💓

Omg my brain has melted 🫠 so hot 🔥 🥵

Cutie09💓

Oh Jesus's lol 😆 😂 another cracking start 🤣 this gonna be amazing I can tell

Skyy Johnson

Same

LittleMai

It’s the apple snobbery for me. 😂 I’d snatch that thing up and take a big bite, staring straight into the windows of his soul, with a glint of “fuck you” in my eyes. This one is perfect for us fun sized brats. 😋

Lakora

The beginning is censored cause it's what goes on YouTube, and it would get demonetized if those weren't censored! I know, I'm sad about it too 😔

Lakora

Fun fact, they actually used to be delicious!! But then selective breeding for improved skin thickness (so they could survive shipping across the country--they used to bruise and spoil WAY too fast) reduced the flavor and texture so badly.....

Gia the bunny queen

Omg I'm gonna cry that was amazing.

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OK, wild!

Krypton 025

Fun fact, Wikipedia is wrong. 嘎啦果 "gāla guǒ" is actually not black diamond, it’s just gala apples (originated in New Zealand). (You see the similarities in pronunciation? 😂). The Apple talked about in this audio is called either 黑卡，黑钻(black diamond)，or just simply Tibet apples Lmao.

Lakora

YES, another Macintosh lover!! <3

ThisBarbieisBored

The nerd in me who loved the apple unit of my college botany course is very happy with all the fun info in these comments lol

Razzyeen

I very much dislike apples. That being said I would absolutely bug this man for a slice of his precious apple, PURELY to annoy him.🫡🍎

Amelia Satanas

The info dumping about this apple is what's magical🥹 I do love an apple guy🥵😍🖤

Midnightcrayon88

I love educational DD lol but I fully understand the feeling. Let me have my moment in peace! And when you asked their favorite apple, I was like "don't say it, don't say it, don't say it" because I knew it was coming 😂 Nobody with taste chooses red delicious!

Katherine

I looked up the apple and immediately wanted to taste it. It is unlikely I will get the chance unless I go to Asia which is on my list. Oh my gosh it was so beautiful and not what I expected while listening to this. Thanks for the apple intense info that tickled my tastebuds. I hope your stay in Asia leads you to sharing more culinary delights as part of your story telling.

Sundrop_tea

Pink Lady's and Sugarbees for me while we on the topic of apple's

Melissa Janelle

So...I'm only 2:39 in and I paused to nerd out over this apple haha super cool!

Melissa Janelle

Am I the only one who legit paused this to search for said majestic apple and see if it's real? 😂

brneyes_tk

😂 Ok, then you definitely need to see the movie The Thomas Crown Affair 🍏

Ruby

I just saw a picture of The Son of Man on a IG post and first thought came to my mind was your comment! 🤭

Daisy

All I see are W's- got railed against the wall AND got a slice of the apple! Fed X2

Daftookami

Great audio. I love when you make the episode playful and fun like this. You should do it more often. Its quite lovely

Blueluelie

Sheesh all that over an apple 🥵 pleasee don’t cut off the curses! I love my fucks!

Diesel Dreamer

You are SO good at writing dialogue. The intro part had me cackling, the whole scenario with this apple conoisseur and his deeply offended banter was hilarious. Great work!

puppyglock

i was actually astonished bc i was like. how is he gonna spin this and yet u managed to make it sexy it was infuriating

.

If I've learned anything from this ep, it's that people get riled up about apples.

AFineCuppaTea

No problem! ☺️ I know only cause I found him through YT. I suppose it would be too much editing to put the uncensored full version on here, so he leaves it as is for convenience.

puppyglock

i had no idea i could get so worked up over a story about an exotic apple and yet here i am

Pathygenic Mistyfig

I love how he goes in depth about he knows a guy. .. underground apple dealers are now a thing in my head

kibozuu

Oooh is that right? I didn't know that. Thanks for explaining! I did notice the further you get into the audios the cussing isn't censored, but wasn't sure if that was a style choice. Thanks again!

Julz

Bring it on ha ha

T C

Me: knows I’m allergic to apples Also me: knows DAMN well I would still risk it every time if it leads to this 😂😂

Michelle

I want one

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DDA branded apple satchel -- new merch concept?

mangooooo

what’s an apple satchel? i see rlly great designer purses when i look it up hopefully deep dark rocks em

brneyes_tk

Might be a future Halloween costume lol

Ruby

LOL now I can’t unsee it!

brneyes_tk

Recently tried a cosmic crisp...what IS this magic? Crunchy with a hint of nectarine 🤯

brneyes_tk

Seriously agree 😂

brneyes_tk

Well, you just solved a puzzle for me. The creative bug has been cycling around so I was visualizing a female version of The Son of Man painting the day before you posted this. Sidestep my mini freakout that this was about an apple 👀😵‍💫, and I can't unsee a black diamond in this female version of the painting. We all must have apples on the brain 😅 Adding to the unofficial poll, pinata apples are my fav. Never ate so many apples in a single season than when I found those.

AFineCuppaTea

He censors the cursing in the beginning bc those parts are put on YouTube as previews! ^^ YouTube would demonetize his videos if they have too many curse words in the beginning. 😬

Ruby

These past two days, whenever I cut apples in the morning, it’s like an instant replay of this audio plays in my head. How am I supposed to survive going to the grocery store and seeing apples?! 🤣

Ann Harlow

Lol yes 🤣 and thank you! 💕

Ann Harlow

Thank youu 💓

dark-vigilant

@Ann Harlow Welcome to the club! Haha yes, I totally forgot about that! After all the trouble of speaker refusing to let listener try his apple, he finally gave in. 🤭😅😭🍎

DontMindMe

this was so fucking good it scratched an itch i didn't know was there (favorite apples are fujis)

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Sorry, fixed!

kitty kat

you said 37:30 in the caption it's 27 😩

kitty kat

welcome!!

Jenima

Guess Eve tempted the serpent with a black diamond 😘

cc

Not me not noticing anything because I haven’t finished the other audios. But glad that you were able to take the time off for yourself! I hope the holidays were happy for you! Also, I agree. Red Delicious is… just eugh. I don’t get why they have delicious in its name. 😩 (jk, ik I just don’t like associating the word with it)

xy

Hehehehe so cuteee

Vic.

Oh look, another favorite of mine. 🔥

Addy

You mischaracterized me with this red delicious nonesense. Everyone knows Honeycrisp or a good Macintosh is superb

Ann Harlow

Omg hiii thank you! 🥰 These audios just became my new obsession 🤭

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Welcome to the party, Ann! 💕

Ann Harlow

Same 😂

Ann Harlow

I downloaded Patreon specifically bc I saw this on YouTube and omg I was not disappointed... I'm obsessed with your voice and the way you talk, it's just incredible. Also I love that she got some of the apple in the end after all that lol

Michelle

16:48-17:13 - your voice.... "sigh", your words..... Mmmm.

Miss Katonic

As a goth girlie, I want that apple. I'm getting a flight when it's in season and bribing anyone I see to find me one... Red delicious are soggy and you can't even bake with them and I'll fight about it. Then again, I'm happy to die on any hill that is about my foodie nonsense. Hehehehehe, but apple satchel? Nerd. 🤣🤭

kibozuu

Hot as ever Dark and Welcome back! Also can you not censor the cussing? The whole point of listening is to listen to your hot ass voice say cuss words that send shivers down my spine. The censoring throws me out of immersion and if ppl don't like cuss words they shouldn't be on a NSFW ASMR's patreon. I want the filth, grit, and intensity!

Violet Tendencies

Jesus. I don’t know what life choices led me here…but I’m not complaining.

Pandora Mauve

@DDA Aww, I thought I would be just a little weird. 😉

Pandora Mauve

Unfortunately, I’m a mouthy little thing. And sometimes that mouth gets me into trouble. 😬 However, I do get a sort of thrill from exchanging sassy banter. That’s my bit of brat coming out. 😅 But I do know who I can and cannot do that with. 😊

Aaishah

Haha I fear u may have a type for mean guys aka yandere....I on the other hand had the instinct to smack him when he was talking shit at me prolly cuz I'm a brat, hehe sorry not sorry deepy ;)

AFineCuppaTea

Lol me either!! But I saw everyone else adding their two cents, so I wanted to contribute 😆

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HEH

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You're arguably less weird, Pandora.

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Thanks, Tea! I must say I didn't think the comments would get *this* rowdy about apples. Good to see the passion haha

AFineCuppaTea

guess whose back ~ back again ~ deep dark’s back ~ tell a friend ~ 😆 glad you enjoyed your long break!!! ☺️ i already wished you this on your “gagged by your older punk friend” audio, but happy holidays + new year!! last year was the worst year of my life and you were a big part in making it bearable ♥️ can’t wait to see what you come up with this year!! on that note, these intros keep getting more and more hilariously random!! xD Was this apple so delicious you just had to make an audio about it?? 🤣 Never change!! (Also, I will not tolerate this red delicious slander!!! sure, they’re not the BEST applies, but they aren’t the worst! macintosh are the worst, since they’re mushy 😙 Granny smith apples are my fav!) Anyhoo, this character was way too pressed about fuggin apples and totally deserved to be teased for it! xD Spontaneous wall sex is always fun! ♥️ Had a lovely time with this ✨ Enjoy the sun wherever you are! It’s in the 20s here in the Northeast of the US 🥶

Pandora Mauve

Before I get all silly, am I just weird for not having a favorite apple? 🤔 Bro…you’re gonna be smelling grilled cheese. Panini is too fancy for me. 😂 Um…not me instigating an encounter. See at 8:34, my body would instinctively respond by wrapping my legs around his waist and looking mischievous. 😏 And I would be causing the right kind of trouble. 🤭 At 16:16 on…I’m just a puddle. Something about the way you talked in this one just overloaded my brain, and I loved it. 🤤🥴

dark-vigilant

I love the fact that you make everything sound realistic. Those chair screeches make it easier for imagination. 🥰💞

January Jaxon

I love that “apple historian” is someone’s actual job title. 😆 It didn’t affect me personally except that my loathing of Red Delicious apples was validated, haha. I was too little at the time to register consumer effects. But I’ve since learned from friends that it hit our farming communities brutally hard.

Sarah Sinner

Ah, that explains why there is at least one actual apple historian in the US (read a couple more articles about Red Delicious and/or the apple industry). How did this affect you personally / consumers?

Studybug.Mp3

LMAOOO OMG

JL

Happy to have piqued your interest! 😊

Liz

Snake x Eve in the garden of eden 🍎 [GONE WRONG] [GONE SEXUAL]

January Jaxon

Yep. Came close to single-handedly killing the Washington apple industry when I was a kid in the 90s.

Sarah Sinner

Had to look this up and you are spot on. https://www.nytimes.com/1984/09/26/garden/ok-red-delicious-move-over.html (Scroll down for the full article from 1984 that explains this phenomenon)

Sarah Sinner

This explanation makes me want to try to learn mandarin someday, so intriguing.

Divina

Apple is a new flavor of freak lol I love it!

izzy

glad you’re feeling better!!! happy new year & hope your break was nice and restful, thanks for always spoiling us <3

Queen Zelda

I missed you so much, have a great start in your new year and please take care and stay safe, we all love you <3 (and wow...grumpy cute guys...are so yummy, especially with your voice, DDA x3)

Nandita

I'm very grateful for the apple🥸🫰💕

Brunette

Ahhh ive missed you quite a bit! Im back and ready to binge all your content! Glad to see you still kicking 🩷

BKL

This was a fun one! I'm glad you got to take a break even if it started out unintended. My favorite apple is Honeycrisp ❤️

JL

Hehe, yeah! 😁

Tiffany

Okay, so first off, a warm welcome back to you!! And coming back strong with an absolutely 'Delicious' audio!! 😉🤭 I, as many have already stated, think it's absolutely wonderful that you took that time to yourself. Everybody needs a break from time to time, even from things you enjoy or love to do!! 💙 For me personally, I know that if I don't take that time away, I won't be at my best and therefore won't be able to *give* my best in any endeavors I may pursue. Secondly, in regards to my favorite apple, I like a particular kind called SweeTango. That is the brand name as well, I believe, but they are seasonal and are only in stock during the fall/winter months. I don't claim to be an apple connoisseur, but they are so crisp and juicy, and are both sweet and tangy (hence the name, I presume). 🥰🥰

Artimus Twilight

The panini and apple connoisseur part at the beginning had me-💀🤣🤣 these stories are so creative, can’t wait for more.❤️

riss

Pre🎧: Saw the notification in my emails yesterday and *genuinely* felt a chill run down my spine. Couldn't even will myself to hit play right away because the nervous anticipation was too strong! As much as you were missed, I'm happy that you're in a healthier state. 🌹 I know this delayed gratification is about to pay off sooooo well... good to have you back 😘

Ruby

I second this one with Cantonese .. especially if you pronounce the number 4 slightly wrong it becomes death 🤣

Jade_Cinnamon

Mango supremacy

kurea13angel

Well if you do count me in. I have a few story tellers with a deep voice who i love to listen to when i am going to bed (i have trouble falling asleep and it takes hours with out it or its listening to rain and thunder, a maha myityunajaya mantra or a genius brain wave hertz, but it sometimes gets old and i need to find a different way to have my brain shut down for atleast an hour or so hah. Anyways i have a few ideas for you if youd like, not that i have them all written down or worked out but i write short stories and haikus (poetry) although they might need some tinkering and such. So if youd like i could share them with you.

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Golden Delicious is very respectable in my humble view.

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This isn't a green vs red thing -- my complaint is specifically about a cultivar called "Red Delicious". You'd recognize one if you saw it. Anyway, Pink Lady is my current #1

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Thank you, Sarah. Pink Lady is my current favorite of the mass market entries. Take me to a farmer's market in New York or New England, though, and all bets are off. Love mangosteen! ❤️

JL

Haha, just wait till you try Cantonese! 😜

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Hey Shellbelle, that's really interesting -- glad it's feeling better now! ❤️

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Ah but despite the name, the "Chinese Red Delicious" is not directly related to the US Red Delicious!

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Welcome to the party, kurea13angel! I've been approached by a few authors who were interested in having me narrate their work. I might be open to it someday -- if I do, you all will be the first to know ❤️

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Thanks for the lesson, JL! Tones are so nonintuitive to me haha

January Jaxon

Red Delicious apples are specifically bred to look pretty at the expense of actually tasting good. No joke.

JL

Sorry, I was being modest before when I said I wasn't going to comment on your Mandarin. 😅 But now it's bugging me, so.... imo, the best pronunciations were the second one and the one at 5:27. As far as I can tell, the tones are supposed to be ga1 la5 guo3, and that's what you did for those two pronunciations. Tone 1 is a high tone that is sustained (stays high). Tone 5 is a neutral tone. Tone 3 is a tone that starts low, dips and then rises slightly. (I don't think the dip is always obvious, though.) I think the key to this one is to start with a higher tone and end with a lower one. One other thing I would do is to make each syllable more distinct, because they are three separate characters. So, not "galaguo" but "ga la guo." Okay, that's all. I'll shut up now. 😅

gooner

man the way i jumped up and down

Pam 701

I forgot to mention in my earlier comment that my favorite apple is usually Gala or Fuji, but lately I have been enjoying Honeycrisp. They’re all delicious! ❤️🍎❤️

Amandroid

Welp, I think I like apples now.

lz

i missed these!! but im glad you had time to recuperate and just enjoy the holidays, much love🔥

kurea13angel

Oke, i am new here and i was wondering.. as your voice is totaly awesome and deep (yes i wish your voice could wake me up instead of my alarm clock, as it now only makes me grumpy and not want to get up). You would be great as a story teller (like reading a mystery/ horror/ ect book 😅 to a loved one with a fire place burning, while taking sips of your hot coco with marchmellow and snacks... and after the reading a delicious dessert)

Guilty Pleasures

HAVE NONE OF YOU HAD A GOOD RED DELICIOUS? like fudge. Don't worry studybug I'm with you. 🤜

Guilty Pleasures

Honestly I thought it would be a breed of Gala...cause well.

Guilty Pleasures

Hey! Red Delicious are great when there not those mass produced bundles! Freshly plucked and washed is the way to eat them.

Guilty Pleasures

I was curious about the apple so I looked it up. It says its a breed of Chinese red delicious. I laughed cause I had looked it up just after he insulted my love for a well grown red delicious.

Shellbelle

Happy New Year! Happy to hear you are well. I too missed you and am actually grateful (now) for the forced break. I think of your audios as self care but when they weren't there, I realized my over-reliance on them(it was borderline obsessive.) TMI? It was good to explore and expand self care to other activities. This audio was so good, your voice is as amazing as ever (lots of hmmms) and I'm now going to research said apple.

Sarah Sinner

Loved this dynamic. The banter, getting challenged by the listener character to wrestle, the sass, the geeking out over apples, the pinning down against the wall and using body weight to your advantage and getting played with the most obvious tricks in the book the smaller listener character can think of. And yes! The slight reference to the previous audio where the speaker character has a sensitive neck. It comes across like some kind of Easter egg and I am here for it. Also: Pink Lady apples for the win! Ps. Back in Asia: have you tried jackfruit, tamarind, snake fruit, mangosteen, rose apple, durian, dragon fruit? #fruit-envy Pps. Love that you took some time off, it was SO very well deserved. When I started to get slightly worried, I looked at how frequent you usually post and I noticed you seemingly never really took time off since the start of this channel. 🥺 So I removed my comment about your absence.

RetroFuturism

What's your favorite apple variety? ...Green? I love his passion for apples but I have no idea what my man is talking about.

Diabolikupcake

Welcome back!! Never have I wanted an apple so bad though 😭 lol great episode, definitely going in the favorites

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Eyy I stumbled into it!

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I think it speaks volumes that the Red Delicious is *issued* as the token fruit by institutions like schools and prisons.

Dirnali

oh my god....yet another example of why your audios are the sexiest thing on the planet to me 🔥 like others said, I missed you too but glad you got a break. life happens. and that was TOTALLY worth a slice of that apple...🫠

Natttwenty

Honeycrisp 4 Life 👊

Cherry Klash

I’m so glad you are safe and happy in your new environment/home! Stay safe and happy* new year?! Can I even say that still? 😆

Kas

The sheer power of the phrase “what are you gonna do about it?” That just has the ability to turn on the brat button inside my silly little whimsical brain (not the charli xcx kind im afraid)

blissful schnooze

I love this character, he's ridiculous 😂 he'd be so fun to pester. And "Stinky panini" is now my cat's new nickname 🐈‍⬛🐈

timberalbright

I swear I thought you said gabagool lmao. Glad to see you're back!

xy

What in the standing missionary 😭😳🥰🥹

xy

Also the pronunciation is pretty accurate!!

xy

The obsession with apples is SO F*CKING CUTEEEE🥰

AnimeDiplomat

One of my favorite microtropes is the "What're you gonna do about it?" and you are easily one of the best at it in the VA game! It's probably why your grumpy/bully characters are instant favorites 😏 Happy New Year & glad to hear you're taking time for yourself! May the New Year bring you peace, prosperity, and good health (which will be much easier considering the favorable latitudinal adjustment) 🥳✨

Sim

I cringed when the answer was “Red Delicious”; the only circumstance I would buy one of those is if it were required to be bought in the same bundle as one of my favorites. Fuji are nice but hit or miss, Honeycrisp are delightful, and Cosmic Crisp are the best, in my humble opinion. As delicious as this audio you’ve cooked up for us 💚 Wishing you a wonderful time in Asia this year! Hope you eat so much good food and see many beautiful sights.

Sim

A person of fine taste 💚

Rachel Tipaldi

Golden delicious are awesome. The only green apple variety I will eat.

Rachel Tipaldi

Honey crisp is delicious.

Rachel Tipaldi

An apple satchel? *zips off to Google* Sooo, he carries a purse for his apple? 🤔 Interesting. I love how he's so passionate about this apple and they're fucking with him over it. Haha. Bro, you always have me laughing. I love it. Thank you. 😊 And welcome back from your much needed "you" time. Glad you're well and feeling rejuvenated.

Ariel

Me and my social anxiety ass practicing what to say before making a phone call but then IMMEDIATELY forgetting as soon as they say “hello?” 😂😂😂

Sherri

Such an apple tease! 🤭

Ruby

Gala and Envy (when they are on sale 🤣 ) are my favourites. Dang, I think I just melted into the wall with this one-it’s so how I’d imagine being pinned against the wall!🫠🫨🫣

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Thanks, Ariel! I tried to get the tone right on "guo" the first time I said it.. then immediately forgot for the rest of the episode haha

JL

So, you were in Tibet looking for that apple, right? 😉 It's great that you were able to take some time for yourself and that you're feeling refreshed! I'm really glad you're back. You were missed! 💗 I'm a Cantonese speaker, so I won't comment on your Mandarin. (I'm assuming it was Mandarin.) I've never heard of a Gala Guo before, so I looked it up, and they look amazing! My favourite apple is the Cosmic Crisp. I like the crisp texture, and the name just sounds super cool. 😊🍎 Btw, "apple satchel" is the cutest thing I've heard all week! Also: Whew! The listener *really* wanted a taste of that apple, huh? 🤭

Ariel

As a Chinese speaking listener, I can confidently say your pronunciation was actually not bad. My mandarin class had so much worse pronunciations so I was pleasantly surprised 👏

Filigree

This was entertaining and cute. Granny Smith apples personally for me 🍏🍏🍏

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Thanks, Michelle. I hope I get to try the Gala Guo myself someday ✨

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Used to love them but a few years ago their quality in the NYC area fell off a cliff. Very odd. Anyway, thank you for the well wishes ❤️

H4rrisH4wk

Fair warning - it's a cooking apple - so you'll want to bake it first - with raisins is great - there are recipes online.

Rachel Tipaldi

Hey hey now, Red Delicious were good... 20 years ago. 😏 Personally, Gala or Pink Lady apples are my favorite.

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Granny Smith is very respectable in my opinion! It's the only *tart* mass-market entry and we need that.

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Never tried one! I'll put it on my list.

Michelle

I would rather not eat an apple than to eat a red delicious apple, too soft, too mushy. This Tibetan delicacy sounds like a true gem among apples. Don't give a slice to just anyone, only the truly appreciative. Finally, We are up against the wall! So hot with the manhandling, the pinning, and sexy talk in the second half. It's amazing how dramatically the speaker's attitude changes once the listener softens up. Can I just say yes, yes, and double yes? Staying off the floor seems to definitely have it's benefits and I had all kinds of *benefits* listening to this episode. I guess we have to stay off your neck too - such a sensitive guy. Your voice is magical. The way you talk, the timbre of your voice, the things you say and all the little noises you make just made my night. Now that I'm all relaxed, I expect a good night's sleep. Happy to hear you are alive, well, and well rested. Thank you for the present DDAddy.

zaphina lillith

May be basic, but I like honey crisp personally lol. Happy new year, wishing you health, success, and abundance!

zeed

“Please take six steps back” 🤣🤣🤣🤣 holy fuck this is too good dude

zeed

So glad you’re doing okay! I’m five minutes in and laughing my ass off. You are so immensely talented as well as hysterical. And just such a fucking dork. “Are you unwell?” “What’s your favorite apple variety?” “I just went from being irritated by you to worried about you.” 🤣🤣 But truly your intelligence shines in all of your audios, and I appreciate your wit and vast obscure knowledge so dearly 😄

Pam 701

This was so funny at the beginning - I was laughing so hard. Your exasperated explanation of just how special the apple was, and why was priceless. I missed you terribly, but understand completely the need for the break. The arguing and pinning against the wall was so hot. You are so freaking good at every aspect of these audios. I’ve come to the conclusion that I am truly addicted to your voice. As soon as I started listening to this, it was like a hit of the best drug imaginable. This was a great audio to start off the new year, and I hope your 2025 will be as awesome as you are! ❤️😩🫠🥵🔥🥵🫠😩❤️

aevis

This was timed so perfectly because I’m just on my flight back home! So I can’t wait to listen later. But I’m so glad you gave yourself a break as you deserve it. (Also I relate to the pronouncing as I’m learning myself 🫂🤍)

Lakora

Red delicious are NASTY 🤺 en guard!

ArteryParty

Sir, you must pay the apple tax. (I'm personally a granny smith/fuji truther. :) welcome back! 🙏)

Lakora

Apples are the superior fruit 😋 😌

H4rrisH4wk

Okay but my fave type of apple is actually Annie Elizabeth's (specifically from the tree growing in my mother's back garden that my grandmother and I helped transplant from an allotment we used to have - super special because my great-grandmother was named after the apple type). But y'know I don't hate red delicious.

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Thank you, January 🙏

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Thanks, Ruby!

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Thank you, Purity ❤️

Studybug.Mp3

🤺

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Do we have a Red Delicious apologist among us????

Jade_Cinnamon

This is obviously apple propaganda in disguise

LaShawn

Welcome back; glad you're doing well 🙂..as for the audio, I'd like to mention that I'm not an apple freak, more like a freak that loves apples (I like Fuji myself), does that count? Lol😊🤭

Studybug.Mp3

Apple slander

PurityofThought

You were missed immensely! I was quietly growing more concerned over here, but I'm so glad you're okay and that you prioritized your well-being. Overjoyed to have you back 🤍

Ruby

Happy new year :) I’m glad you’re back and rejuvenated AND you got us presents. I can’t wait to listen to it later. 😊

SJR

You just can’t get this quality from anyone else fr

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Red Delicious, specifically, are the enemy.

Leigh

How much apple research did it take to write this? Also, my favourite apple is golden delicious; am I basic?

Kenna

love you pookie

January Jaxon

So glad you took us at our word that it’s okay to take breaks! Delighted you’re well and feeling better.

Naomi

Just got home- I love when the timing is so right. Welcome back, I’m so glad you took the time you needed!

Galvanized_Doll

The “no I’m not sorry f*ck off” sent me 😂 but welcome back 💕 missed this voice 🥳

e

so glad you were able to take a break!! welcome back 🫶🏻

SJR

I appreciate the magic of the apple, don’t get me wrong. I want him to have this experience, and I love that he’s passionate about it. However, I have also never felt the urge to bully someone until right now. (Also yes agree red apples are gross. Green apples for life).

Vered

I'm only 3 minutes into the audio, but I have to say, this one is hilarious!!!! I've missed you! Glad to hear you are feeling better And that the rest did you good...