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Chapter 255: Intentional severing
🕑 Added 2023-01-27 10:04:48 +0000 UTCSuri’s tether looks different from mine. Rather than a metal chain, it’s more like a rope made of pure, cyan energy.
The pulsing glow it produces is actually quite mesmerising. I’m clearly not the only one who thinks so, as Kaitlynn practically can’t take her eyes off it. She is sitting by Yuna, soothingly stroking the vixen’s fur. From Kait’s expression, however, I get the feeling it’s at least in part for her own comfort.
And hey, I get it.
For the sake of ease, I conjured up a wooden chopping block, which Suri is now hovering next to, holding her tether steady on top of it with her human conjuration. As I move to stand next to her, holding a rather large and nasty-looking conjured axe, this is starting to feel an awful lot like an execution.
Then again, it kinda is. And perhaps that metaphor will help make this happen.
“Did it hurt, when you severed yours?” Suri suddenly chimes.
“Like a bitch,” I reply honestly. “But it was over pretty quick. I think. It was a long time ago. So, ehm, are you ready?”
“Well, I suppose there’s no reason to delay,” Suri chimes airily. “You might as well give it a try.”
I narrow my eyes at her. “You seem pretty calm about this. Know something we don’t?”
“I’m a being made of pure energy, dear,” Suri chimes haughtily. “My crystal body is ultimately just a vessel for my mind. I’m sure there will be some things I’ll miss, like being able to manipulate Lavi and Qi, or my new status, but I’m not as attached to my material trappings as you fleshy creatures.”
Huh. She’s got a point. It’s probably not as bad for her as for us. Except for the part where she doesn’t get a choice in the matter.
However, from the way Kaitlynn’s shaking her head, I get the feeling she’s not entirely buying Suri’s nonchalance.
Also, it’s interesting how Suri says she’ll miss her status, but doesn’t mention any friends. Perhaps Kaitlynn is right about her being lonely.
“I can’t say I’m too fond of waiting for you to swing the axe, though,” Suri chimes. “If you’re going to do this, then please just do it already, dear,”
“Right, sorry,” I reply. “All right then, here I go.”
Closing my eyes, I take a moment to calm down and focus on my Willpower.
There’s more to using it than just pouring in some Espir. The power generated that way, by itself, wouldn’t do much. To really achieve something, it needs to have an intent.
For example, if I just conjured some flames, they wouldn’t do jack shit against someone on my level. However, once I add my Willpower with the intent to devour, I can turn them into my deadly Devouring Flames, which feed on the spiritforms of my foes.
But adding intent isn’t so easy. It requires a genuine desire. The basis upon which I developed my Devouring Flames was the desire to consume my prey and grow stronger.
In this case, I’m relying on my remaining anger towards Suri and my wish to hurry up and leave this Realm to form an intent to sever.
It takes me a moment to purge my mind of extraneous thoughts and really focus on the desire to sever, but I eventually manage.
Next, I pour a prodigious amount of Espir into the twenty-five volcanoes full of molten steel that represent my Willpower, and they erupt with power.
I snap my eyes open as I pour that power into my conjured axe, causing it to gain a shimmering, deep-purple aura.
Sweet.
Without further ado, I heft the axe up high and, with a grunt, bring it down upon Suri’s tether.
The result is not entirely what I had envisioned.
Rather than cutting Suri’s tether in twain, my axe bounces right off.
“Hmm,” Suri chimes. “A swing and a miss.”
“Didn’t miss though, did I?” I drawl. “Hang on, let me try again.”
I reform my intent to sever, really taking my time to get it right, but the result of my next swing is the same. And the result of the one after that as well. And of the one after that...
To be honest, I already kinda figured it would turn out like this after the first attempt, because it didn’t feel like I even came close. Felt more like I tried to cut down an ancient oak with a rubber chicken or something.
The attempts after that didn’t fare any better, but I still had to try.
“What’s the matter, can’t hack it like you used to?” Suri quips after my seventh failure.
Rolling my eyes, I rest the axe on my shoulder. “Har har. I told you this was an experiment, didn’t I?”
“Quite. Well, are you all done experimenting? I don’t know if you’ve ever had someone repeatedly smack your mortal tether with a sharp object before, but I can tell you it’s not the most pleasant sensation.”
Yuna lets out a soft growl.
Kaitlynn just sighs and scratches her behind the ear. “I know, honey,” she whispers. “I know. It’ll be over soon, I promise.”
I allow the chopping block and my axe to fade, feeling a bit sheepish, but unwilling to show it. “Yeah, I’m done. Sorry. Anyway, it looks like I can’t sever your tether, at least not like this. Which means you’re going to have to do it yourself.”
Suri sighs. “And if I won’t, you’ll make me, correct?”
I nod solemnly.
“Very well. Walk me through your process.”
Frankly, my ‘process’ isn’t exactly complicated. The only difficulty is in forming the intent to sever. After all, this isn’t something Suri wants to do herself, it’s something we’re forcing upon her.
I explain as much to her, and give some suggestions of things she can try, like channelling her desire to be free into an intent to sever the things that constrain her.
Suri appears to listen carefully, providing only the occasional nod in reaction, then closes her conjured form’s eyes and goes silent.
I resist the urge to tap my foot as I wait. It doesn’t help my patience that I’m starting to think it might not be possible for Suri to do it at all, if she’s truly reluctant.
Which means I may have to resort to making her want it through the use of Commands, and I’d really rather not.
Just the idea makes me feel... unclean.
Suri’s eyes open again. She reaches out for her tether with one hand, as a pair of what look like pruning shears appear in her other. Pulling her tether taut, she sets the shears against it, and then, in a single snip, cuts the glowing cord of light in two.
One end of it shoots off into the distance, out of the Realm, while the other recoils into Suri, who doubles over, pale-faced.
“That... certainly smarts,” she chimes.
I squat down in front of her and take a careful look at the frayed end of her tether, which seems to be leaking rapidly fading sparks of cyan light, to make sure she isn’t trying to pull a fast one on us.
Satisfied that it’s genuinely her tether and that it’s properly severed, I get back up. “Well done. Take some time to think about your promises. We plan to leave in a couple of hours, so we’ll come collect you then.”
“Hold on,” Suri replies with a grimace, as she sits down on the floor, one hand to her stomach. Yuna gets up and bounds over in a flash, worriedly sniffing at Suri, who just smiles faintly and reaches up to pet her. “I... would like to ask something,” Suri continues. “Both of you, but starting with Kaitlynn.”
“Go on,” Kaitlynn says softly. “I’m listening.”
Suri’s conjured form takes a deep breath. I can’t help but wonder how much of that is a show. Then again, I have as little need to breathe here as she does.
“Previously,” she chimes, “you said you wished to forgive me for putting Commands on you, but that you couldn’t be sure the wish was genuine, due to those very Commands. Now that Emma has removed them, I’d like to ask... well, are you willing to forgive me?”
Kaitlynn looks down, seemingly weighing her words. Finally, she gives a small nod. “Yeah. I am. Looking back at it all with a clearer mind, I do believe you were doing what you felt was best for me. That doesn’t mean I appreciate the methods you chose... just that I get where you were coming from.”
“I understand,” Suri chimes. “Thank you, Kaitlynn.” Then she turns to me. “As for you, Emma... I appreciate that you don’t care much for me at the moment, but I think you used to, and I still care for you. Do you think that you’ll be able to forgive me as well, someday?”
I avert my eyes from her earnest gaze, rubbing at my temple. “I... look, I don’t know if this the time for this kind of talk. We’re about to go on a rather dangerous journey, and I need to go prepare mentally, so—”
Kaitlynn cuts me off with a gentle touch. “Come on, babe,” she whispers, leaning in to my ear. “You know you’re not supposed to keep it all in anymore. Let your emotions out. This is a safe space.”
Safe space my ass.
That doesn’t mean she doesn’t have a point though. I may be at risk of bottling shit up again.
I sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose between my index and middle finger for a moment. “Fine. Truth be told, I don’t know, Suri. Did I care for you? Yes, yes I did. Despite my best efforts to keep you at arm’s length emotionally—because I didn’t trust you—I cared. You were... my rock, during months of harrowing, near-fatal experiences. Of course we bonded. Or so I thought. That’s why it hurt so badly when it turned out it was just a game to you, and in your eyes, I was nothing but a prize friggin’ poodle.”
Suri is silent for a moment, then she lets out a sigh as well. “Yes. I see that now. It has been a... disconcerting experience, to widen my perspective. Many things I took for granted seem so crooked now, and things I overlooked so glaringly obvious. It makes me feel like a right ass, to think about such things. For what it’s worth, I really am sorry.”
I purse my lips, then deflate a bit with a sigh. “Okay. I accept your apology. That doesn’t mean I’m ready to just, like, forgive you, but... yeah.”
“It is enough,” Suri chimes. “Thank you. I’ll go think about what I should like to promise, as you suggested. When you’re ready to leave... well, you know where to find me.”
Kaitlynn joins me in front of the already-opening glass door, and takes my hand. “I’m proud of you,” she whispers.
I silently give her hand a squeeze, still feeling a little too raw to react verbally, but glad of her presence.
As soon as we’re out of the cell, I warp us back to our luxurious prison suite.
Kaitlynn stretches out her back. “Guess that means it’s my turn, huh?” she mutters.
Since Goddess said it would be best for Suri and Kaitlynn’s severings to happen near-simultaneously, I’d already prepped her beforehand.
Kaitlynn picks a spot on the lush carpet hit by a beam of light through the window, and sits down cross-legged.
Looking at her straight back and set shoulders, my heart aches. “You can still choose not to do it, you know,” I can’t help but say. “You could stay here. I wouldn’t blame you.”
Kaitlynn looks back over her shoulder, and just smiles at me.
She doesn’t need to add a word, because her sorrowful yet determined expression says everything.
Then she turns back and closes her eyes.
Not wanting to distract her, I stand there frozen as a statue.
For a long while, she just sits there. Finally, she slowly, gracefully lifts a hand. A moment later, a simple pair of scissors comes into being on her palm.
Kaitlynn’s own tether takes the shape of a thin white rope, and I instinctively hold my breath as she sets her scissors against it.
She takes a deep breath.
Then the scissors go ‘snip,’ the soft sound understated, belying the gravity of what just occurred.
The recoiling end of the tether slams into Kaitlynn and she sucks in a breath, but doesn’t let out a peep, despite how badly I know it must hurt.
Only now do I move, quietly kneeling behind her and taking her in my arms. “You’re amazing, and I’m so proud of you,” I tell her softly, slowly rocking her, as tears begin to spill down her cheeks.
They’re going to pay for this. I don’t know how yet, but they will.
Author's note:
I like this chapter. I had some trouble with parts of it, but I feel it really turned out well in the end. ^^
Anyway, thanks for reading! ^^
