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Ava FAIL DAY 😖

🕑 Added 2023-02-12 04:58:35 +0000 UTC

Comments

Christina

You didn’t fail at all ! You recognized you knew the truth and now next time it will be easier to listen to yourself.

Guy Goldstein K

What a great comment

Guy Goldstein K

First of all, you got about a minute of Ava and Jinx coexisting in the same space peacefully, it is a glimpse of time but it is a huge milestone. Second of all, very very inspiring to see you analyzing and processing your gut instinct, I don’t know if you’ve noticed but it seems like you’re slowly but surely becoming more confident with your instincts, it seems like you’re doing the right steps towards your goal of emotional resilience and just you noticing this nuances is again a solid signs of active progress towards becoming more successful while trusting your gut instincts, noticing your “heightened” and becoming more emotionally resilient and in tune with the data your mind collects live. This is actually a really amazing journey to watch, I hope this makes you feel empowered, I want you to know that I appreciate that your take your time with this introduction process, lots of people struggle with birdie introductions and flock integration, it is a challenge that always looks different and is kind of unexpected, your process is realistic and we can benefit greatly from watching you struggle before figuring the situation out (LOL).

Beckie Child

Jaime, a therapist I saw for a while helped me reframe the Itty Bitty Shitty Committee or IBSC, for short. Part of the reason the IBSC exists is to protect yourself from harm. Now, the IBSC goes overboard in terms of protection, but viewing the IBSC as a form of protection helped me get out of the shame spiral a bit faster. Once I understood the purpose of the IBSC, I could ask different questions. I don’t know if this is helpful, but I thought I would share. Go gently with you.

MeghanC

You hold yourself to such high expectations. Which is great but you're exactly like me when those don't go to plan. I beat myself up and feel I've let my animals and self down. But actually, we're not robots, we're not perfect, we're human. Therefore, mistakes are how we learn. It's also how our birds learn sometimes. By not getting it right. I know the perfectionist in us can speak so loudly it drowns out the good we do. But know there is no judgement here. Only support, love and respect.

Kelly Sanchez

Oh Jaime, I needed this right now. Thank you again for being willing to be vulnerable. Because you didn't allow your ego to get in the way, you kept your birds from getting hurt. That's a good trainer with a good eye. Hugs! ♥️

Stephanie Edwards

I love this for so many reasons. 1. By being able to remove Ava when Jinks showed his discomfort, you were able to show both birds they could rely on you both. This might not have been a good experience for you, but it could prove useful in building trust between the birds and humans, and also between the two birds. If jinx can know that Ava will go further away if he gets uncomfortable, he might start feeling he can let her closer. Plus he has the backup of humans that can read him and make sure it happens. 2. It was great to see how you overcame things. 3. Any update on Ava is valuable, even if not much happens. Even if you start filming because you’re going to the aviary to get the birds and then you see something that makes you abort the mission at an earlier stage, people can learn from that. So you could still think about publishing even the really short failures, especially here. People on here care enough to pay to further support you 4. It might have felt like one, but this was not a failure. It’s not a failure, because you read your birds, you tried hard to make things work, while you were more set up for success than you would’ve been on your own, you gathered information which you will find useful, and which other people who are trying to introduce birds might also find useful, and things really didn’t escalate. Don’t be hard on yourself for not trying this when you were on your own, because, although those days might have been good days for Jinx, a birds mood can switch really quickly, and if you were on your own, you could’ve been powerless to stop things and sometimes there’s no coming back from that. The reason the aggression was so hard to spot was because it wasn’t directed at the other bird, and that in itself is beautiful because it shows just how good of a reading you have on Jinx. You were so focused on reading him, and he wouldn’t have been able to do that if you were the only human in the room. 5. I’ve said this before, but I find it more engaging when trainers show when things didn’t work out. It’s easy to feel hope from you, because you’re showing when things don’t go right. There’s a dog trainer I follow whose work I admire and who is very focused on having a positive relationship with your dog, but I don’t feel the same level of connection to this person because they make it seem like they never get frustrated, or fearful, or any of that. They aim to fill people with hope, but their overwhelming positivity can actually be so difficult to match that I feel I might as well not bother. So thank you, thank you for being real. Just a thought, but if there are lots of days when you don’t do stuff because you aren’t set up for success or it doesn’t feel right, perhaps this would make a good oh flock series. Isn’t that what that series is meant for, things that aren’t necessarily going to plan?