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The OP Lich is a Returnee, Book 3 Prologue
🕑 Added 2021-07-04 00:29:57 +0000 UTCLewd Dungeon 22 and Into the Black 29 have been sent to Amazon. Should be live in a day or two.
Prologue – Trade Chat
(Magical World Disharmony Server, General Chat)
UsualSuspect, manoutoftime, muon, MewTwo, Avariel, Chummer, Golddigger, CrazyCelt, Blaze, DoYouEvenLyft?, MarcoPolo, MightMakesRight, MacD, Inquisitor, OrangeQueen, Lizard, RedFox, SemiSolidSnake, BabyShark, Not_the_Face!, Scholar, Patriot, Anonymous3, Anonymous4, Anonymous7, Anonymous9, TheLichQueen, WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot, DigDug, Backlog, DarkAvariel, Knocker, GrimDark, BloodForTheBloodGod, BackDat@55Up and DarkAngel are in the chat.
BabyShark: Oh, god, are you seeing the news out of the UK?
muon: What, did they finally decide that they stood no chance in the World Cup, so they just dropped out to save face?
BabyShark: NO, not sports! I mean the attack on the King!
Patriot: That’s just a false flag antifa propaganda trick put out by the fake news media! Do your research!
AngryMod has joined the chat.
AngryMod: Nope. This is not happening. Debate is accepted, but lies and misinformation is not. Come back in a week. And the rest of you, keep it civil.
Patriot has been suspended for 1 week.
Patriot has left the chat.
AngryMod has left the chat.
Anonymous3: Oof, that was quick.
Backlog: To be fair, after those idiots tried to hold actual witch hunts for mages after their ‘Glorious Leader’ told them to, even after he was out of office, people have been cracking down on the wingnuts, and systematically deplatforming those who want to spread hate.
Lizard: True. At least it led to the churches finally getting taxed, as they grew more and more political.
MacD: That’s what killed off the Baptists, right? Their current crowd aged out, and the kids didn’t want any part of that, so they eventually died off when they couldn’t support themselves any more.
DigDug: Well, there WAS a reformation, as several more moderate denominations merged. They also picked up an older version of the bible, rather than the King James one, that added in stuff about gays and women serving men.
Blaze: Yeah, but even in the South, they’re still not number one.
Golddigger: True. Catholics got a boost, despite having to finally deal with the pedos rather than shuffle them around, and other religions, like Wicca and Buddhism really caught on, as people were looking for something new to believe in.
Scholar: Technically, Buddhism isn’t a religion, but more of a philosophy and spiritual lifestyle.
Inquisitor: Ignoring all of that for now, what happened in the UK, BabyShark? Someone attacked the King?
BabyShark: Yes! They’re saying it is some group called the Pucky? Or something like that. Attacked the palace itself!
OrangeQueen: Oh, my. That takes the whole conflict in North Ireland to a new level, I’m afraid. Was the King in any danger?
TheLichQueen: He would have been, at any other time.
Patriot2 has entered the chat.
Patriot2: You can’t censor me! I have rights! This is a violation of my First Amendment rights! I’m going to sue you so hard!
AngryMod has entered the chat.
AngryMod: First, freedom of speech means the government can’t lock you up for talking shit about the government. It does not mean anyone else has to put up with your shit, or give you a platform for it. Second, using an alternate account to get around a suspension is a big no-no.
Patriot2 has been PERMABANNED.
Patriot2 has left the chat.
Patriot’s IP address has been site banned for six months.
Patriot’s chat logs have been forwarded to Legal Department for possible action.
AngryMod has left the chat.
Inquisitor: Ahem. So, LQ, what did you mean by that?
TheLichQueen: Well, two reasons. First, the King had just taken possession of a protective item that the royal family commissioned with their private funds, to be added to the Crown Jewels. As it stands, little, short of a nuke blowing up in his face, could harm him unless it was incredibly powerful.
TheLichQueen: And second, I was with him at the time, so there was never any real danger to his person. One of my guards quickly took out the attacking force after the first explosion.
BabyShark: Oh, wow! I saw that procession to the palace on TV! You had that carriage with the skeleton horses, and those knights in armor, looking like something out of a storybook!
TheLichQueen: Yes. One of my knights took care of the attackers. The most I did was offer a shield and cover while the King used healing potions to tend to his guards, who had been wounded by a grenade.
BabyShark: Then the gossip story going around that the King saved the lives of two of his royal guards, personally pouring healing potions down their throats? That was real?
TheLichQueen: Yes, indeed. The King did an admirable job of keeping cool under pressure, and acted like a true monarch should.
Chummer: Any idea how they got to the King, though? I mean, even with magic, that’s not something that the British government would just let happen without making it tough.
TheLichQueen: I cannot comment beyond what has been released publicly, unfortunately.
Chummer: Damn.
MewTwo: So, moving away from that, what is this I hear about some new products coming out of Phantomline?
TheLichQueen: Ah, that is something I can talk about. Product testing is about to start with the Shield Bracelets.
MewTwo: Shield Bracelets?
TheLichQueen: Yes, a simple bracelet. When you channel mana, or magicules, into it, you’ll create a shield bubble around yourself. The strength of the shield depends on how much mana you pump into it, and it lasts until you stop pushing mana into it.
MewTwo: Like, just push mana into it, and it does a shield? No CAD adjustments, no casting?
TheLichQueen: Indeed. That’s because it is a focus, not a CAD. It activates as quick as you can react, but you can’t use it to do any other spells with it.
Scholar: Fascinating. So, how is it better than a shield spell cast by a CAD?
TheLichQueen: Cast time from a focus is 150 milliseconds, on average, compared to 550 milliseconds with a CAD. Granted, that is only a difference of 0.4 seconds, but still…
Scholar: 150? That’s faster than the average human reaction time!
TheLichQueen: The focus cuts out a lot of the physical reactions. So, it activates as fast as you can decide to activate it, compared to a CAD, where you have to decide to activate, and then use the CAD controls to cast the spell.
Scholar: My god, is that how you cast so fast?
TheLichQueen: I have multiple foci, and 40 years of practice using them, yes.
BabyShark: Damn. Those terrorists were fucked before they even started the attack.
Comments
Demian Buckle
Thank you for another great Trade Chat.
Mathew Percival
Thanks for the chapter. I think the final line from BabyShark is undoubtedly the winner of this chapter of Trade Chat!
Aztoroth
TRADE CHAT!!! Always pure joy.
