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510. Nothing Could Go Wrong
🕑 Added 2023-03-19 15:59:01 +0000 UTCOh, over there. There’s the other one. And he’s alone! Perfect. Hui flew up to the man, pasting a polite smile on his face. “Excuse me, Elder Brother, but I was wondering—”
The man turned. Hui barely repressed the urge to widen his eyes. Tall! This man is huge!
With a frown, he crossed his arms. “I thought you were going to search for that irregularity.”
Hui laughed nervously. “Haha, I didn’t find anything, so I’m back. Er, Elder Brother—”
“You’re my elder,” Long Tongshi said, frowning.
“Ah… hahaha!” My bad habits of calling everyone elder brother finally bite me in the ass! “I just—”
Long Tongshi raised his hand. He sighed deeply. “Mo Riyan, there’s no need for this poor acting. You only act strange like this when you need something from me. So, what do you need?”
Hui coughed into his hand. Er, I’m sorry to the real Mo Riyan, but… I do need something! “Eld… dear friend, I… forgot something on the other side of the mountains.”
“It’s been fifty years. I’m sure you’re doing fine without it,” Long Tongshi deadpanned.
Fifty—damn cultivators and your ridiculous timeframes! Hui licked his lips. “Ah, I was able to get by for fifty years, but… now, I’ve realized… I really can’t be without it!”
“Put in a request to the Sect Master. I’m sure he won’t ignore it, like he’s ignored every other message we’ve sent him in the last fifty years,” Long Tongshi said.
“Sect Master?” Hui asked. Is it someone I know? I could use this to my advantage!
“Gui Delun. He isn’t the Sect Master yet, but he’s Sect Master in all but name,” Long Tongshi said.
Hui startled. “Gui… Delun?” I killed him! I killed him, and had Chen Wuya check that he was dead! There’s no way—
Eh, wait. These men have been over here for fifty years. Of course they don’t know about something that happened in the last ten! Ah, actually, I feel bad for them. Being so cut off from their sect that they don’t even know I killed the Sect Master…
A spear appeared inches from his nose. Hui jolted and jumped back. “Elder Brother?”
Long Tongshi narrowed his eyes. “So, invader, you don’t even know our Sect Master? Tell me. What did you do to Mo Riyan?”
“Nothing, nothing, I did nothing!” Hui said, putting his hands up. Fuck. I could bluff, but by the look on his face, he isn’t going to listen. That… and, well, my bluffing skills are a little rusty. Hearing Gui Delun startled me so much that I totally gave up the ghost. Bluffing from here is battling a landslide to climb a mountain.
Long Tongshi gave him a suspicious glare. “You’re wearing his skin.”
Hui drew it away from his face, revealing his true face. “I’m wearing a snakeskin! It’s a harmless transformation technique.”
“If that’s the case, then where is Mo Riyan?” Long Tongshi asked.
“I don’t know. What does he usually like to do on a quiet afternoon?” Hui asked.
Long Tongshi glared at him.
Hui bowed apologetically, ignoring the spear in his face. “I’m telling the truth. I just borrowed his appearance, that’s all. I’m not worthy of harming a fly, let alone an innocent cultivator like Mo Riyan.”
“You’re what caused that irregularity in the barrier from earlier, right? So why was that resentment demon chasing you?” Long Tongshi asked suspiciously.
Hui swallowed. “Would you believe that this small cultivator happened to be innocently passing by when the resentment demon jumped out of nowhere and chased after me?”
“Innocently passing by… and then you innocently stole my friend’s face?” Long Tongshi asked.
“Well, that’s… not in so many words, but yes,” Hui said, nodding.
“Unlikely. Draw your sword,” Long Tongshi ordered him.
Hui licked his lips. “I don’t have one.”
“Whatever you fight with, draw it!”
Uh. Elder Brother, I’m a reaper right now. I’m not on duty, but I’m still not a hundred percent sure that I can not kill if I want to! I mean, bopping someone one the head with a feathered fan sent their soul directly to the afterlife. I’m somewhat afraid to so much as slap you, on the off chance my hand counts as a reaping weapon!
Hui shook his head. “I’m innocent, I really am! I won’t fight you. I just—all I wanted was to enter the Southern Sect Conference!”
“Why?” Long Tongshi asked. “For revenge? As the vanguard of an army? To drag that demon onto the other side and wreak havoc?”
“To see my kids!” Hui replied honestly.
“Your children? How does an Eastern Alliance cultivator have children in the Southern Sect Conference?” Long Tongshi mused.
Hui nodded. “Right, right. I’m originally a Southern Sect Conference cultivator! Elder Brother, I was raised in Starbound Sect, and eventually became a member of All-Heavens Sect. I’m an earnest, righteous cultivator who, due to a strange series of events, got caught on the wrong side of these barrier mountains. Elder Brother, please believe me. I’m innocent, totally innocent! I’m a good person, trying to do good things! That’s all!”
“Eh? Long Tongshi, who’s this?” Mo Riyan asked from behind Hui.
“A good person, trying to do good things,” Long Tongshi deadpanned.
Hui pursed his lips. There’s no need to mock me, Elder Brother. He turned and smiled at Mo Riyan. “Elder Brother! I’m an unfortunate Southern Sect Conference cultivator who ended up stuck on the wrong side of this mountain wall. Could you help me make it to the other side?”
Mo Riyan blinked. “Eh? Were you exiled, too? I’m sorry, but the teleportation pad is one-way. It can’t be activated from this side. Otherwise, I would’ve gone back to All-Heavens ages ago.”
Hui sighed. “Then, we have to fly around?”
“That would take months. There’s a storm wall far out into the Great Ocean that surrounds the continent, and it’s even more dangerous to pass through than the mountains,” Mo Riyan said, shaking his head.
Long Tongshi sighed. “You didn’t have to tell him.”
“What? Why withhold that information? It’s true no matter what kind of man he is. Even if he wants to kill us and destroy the sects, it makes no difference. We might die, but the Southern Sect Conference is just as safe as before,” Mo Riyan said.
“Why are you two out here, then?” Hui asked, tilting his head. If it’s so impossible to enter, why bother with guards?
Mo Riyan laughed lightly and scratched the back of his head. “Oh, it’s mostly exile. We’re not guards so much as canaries.”
“Exiled from All-Heavens Sect?” Hui asked. If so, I might have some interesting news for you.
Mo Riyan nodded. “We dared to take a pass at Gui Yutong, and in return—”
“He dared to take a pass at Gui Yutong,” Long Tongshi declared, crossing his arms.
“Then, Elder Brother, who did you take a pass at?” Hui asked curiously.
Long Tongshi crossed his arms. “Sect Master Gui Delun!”
Hui blinked. Eh, Elder Brother’s taste is so heavy?
“Ah—ah, Long Tongshi, you’ve been misunderstood. He challenged the Sect Master to a duel,” Mo Riyan explained, jumping in.
“And got exiled for it? Hmm. I know Gui Delun is small-minded, but that seems excessive,” Hui mused. Cultivators duel all the time. It’s even considered as practice. If he was a disciple, it might be rude, but not exile-for-decades rude.
Mo Riyan coughed. “Ah… he challenged the Sect Master… perhaps, a time or two too many.”
“Five hundred times,” Long Tongshi said, nodding.
“Five hundred—” Hui choked, surprised. How even…? Why…?
Long Tongshi harrumphed. “I waited at least an incense stick’s time between each challenge.”
That’s somewhere between five and fifteen minutes, so Elder Brother, that’s not a great excuse! I’m surprised Gui Delun put up with it for long enough for Long Tongshi to challenge him five hundred times! Even the tolerant me would have only given him three or four challenges before I faked my death and made off in the night!
Mo Riyan leaned in and whispered, “After the first dozen, most of those went to Gui Delun’s secretary.”
Hui shook his head. That poor secretary…
“And I shamed him for that! And in return, he exiled me,” Long Tongshi said, shaking his head.
“You did say you were dueling him for the right to his daughter’s hand. Perhaps that was the objectionable part,” Mo Riyan suggested, smirking a little.
“He knew that was merely an excuse,” Long Tongshi said, waving his head dismissively.
You know, I’m not sure that they deserve to go back… Ah, no. That’s not the point! Maybe they’ll let me take a look at their teleportation pad if I tell them. Hui nodded. “What a pitiful tale, Elder Brother.”
“Pitiful for Gui Delun, maybe,” Mo Riyan muttered.
“But Elder Brother, did you know? Gui Delun has been overthrown. Fen Long, the Patriarch, is in charge once more,” Hui said, smiling.
“Eh? How do you know?” Mo Riyan asked, startled.
“Ah… it’s a sad tale, but I suddenly found myself on the far side of this mountain wall after I encountered a strange artifact in a secret realm,” Hui said. I don’t feel like making up a lengthy lie, so let’s go with that.
“And the resentment demon that was chasing you?” Long Tongshi asked, crossing his arms.
Elder Brother, let’s forget about that, let’s forget! Hui coughed. “When that strange artifact teleported me, I dropped down onto a burial mound, and the demon suddenly and inexplicably, due to no fault of mine, and certainly no experiment or strange unforeseeable mistake, a surged out from under the burial mound. Ah! There was a landslide, at the time. It might have undone a binding or restrictive spell. We can’t know. It’s simply impossible to know for sure.”
“Maybe it was an effect of the artifact,” Mo Riyan suggested.
Long Tongshi hummed, his eyes slightly narrowed.
“Perhaps, perhaps. In any case, now that Gui Delun is no longer in charge, there’s no reason for you two to remain in exile. Luckily, I’m an expert at networks and small realms. If you let me take a look at your teleportation pad, I may be able to help,” Hui said.
“What do nets and realms have to do with teleportation?” Long Tongshi asked.
“Who cares? It can’t hurt. If what he’s saying is true, then we’re stuck out here for no reason,” Mo Riyan said.
Long Tongshi shook his head. “You just want to return, whether there’s a new leader or not.”
Mo Riyan grinned. “Do you not?”
Long Tongshi hesitated, then nodded.
“Excellent! Elder Brothers, why don’t we see that teleportation pad?” Hui suggested, clapping his hands together.
