The black side of burnt toast
🕑 Added 2023-10-20 16:41:38 +0000 UTCI have tried several times to write this, but I keep erasing and starting over. So let's try it this way. All truth, no bullshit.
I am burnt out. Ever since the Ragnarok video I have been fighting chronic fatigue, mood swings, violent outbursts, anger, and despair, and I have just started treatment for it. I am still working on videos, but it can be difficult when I am sleeping over 12 hours a day. I wanted to let you all know what is happening. I am still working, but I am thinking about changing the billing to per video because I have no idea how much time I will need before I can put out another video.
In the meantime I have been at work on a Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous how to. That should be the next video to come out. I will have some content out soon, I hope, but it will likely be Patreon only stuff like a vlog. I am really sorry about this. I feel like shit because it's happening and I can't stop it, or I lack the ability to stop it.
I love ya'll and I hope that this hasn't alienated too many of you, but I am well aware that it might. If so, thank you for your support, and I understand the need to move on.
With love,
Paulie
Comments
Abc Defghi
you got this chief, dark times happen, you´ll get better, sooner or later, if you believe it or not. I and i´m sure others too, believe in you and we´re waitng patiently ´til you´re better. you got this.
Morgan mcmahon
Your cool man, if it isn't fun to make it's not worth making.
Bran
Hey Paulie, sorry to hear about the health issues. Don't stress about us or keeping us happy. You do what you need to do to stabilize and find some enjoyment in your work again. Knowing you're taking care of yourself and your family would make me (and presumably us) most happy.
DeadPengwin
Please take care and look out for yourself. I'll keep enjoying and supporting your content, no matter if you post weekly or on an HBomberguy-schedule.
everynightfever
Take care, man. You still want my dollar?
Mark Skipper
Can't speak for anyone else but I suspect most of us would have been happy to pay our patreon this month despite what may or may not come out. Support is support
Emil G
Take care, man. Despite burnout you have uploaded regularly and with good videos. I was a bit worried though when you posted the "If I fail, I quit" post earlier this year. Try not to be too harsh on yourself. Everyone needs a break.
Strat-edgy Gaming
To let everyone know, I have paused billing for November. Fucking patreon doesn't do per creation billing anymore so I had to do it this way. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who showed concern. I am seeking help and taking it easy for now. Hopefully with some rest I should be back in the saddle soon.
Indrick Boreale
You've been consistently putting out videos quite a bit faster than pretty much all other similar channels I watch. While it has been nice, I have been wondering how you do it. Take a break, man. Love you.
Lukas Curwick
Keep the billing as is. You need support too. You have a community of people that genuinely care for your insight, content and most importantly, your health. I don’t expect everyone to be on board with any idea. There is no perfect world for this situation. Take care of yourself and we will be here for your triumphant return to stability in your life! You are not letting ANYONE down.
Ashley Johnson
Your health is more important than content. We got you 💕
Elgar337
Sounds like a time to replay Dark Souls if you ask me. Nah screw that, take a break. Go on a hike with the family, eat some gabagool, throw the missus a bone. We'll keep it warm for you.
Joey Shabadoo
Bro, you're one of a kind. I'm not going anywhere even if you stop producing new content all together. Get your rest in and focus on what matters. Your electric personality and the openness with which you share your journey, along with the quality and quantity of your content catalog will keep bringing new Paulie Walnuts fans in for as long as YouTube is a thing, no matter what you do in the short term. Speaking as a relatively new viewer, I can already say you've helped me out of a similar situation, and really I can't express my appreciation enough. So scrap that thought of moving away from monthly billing, but do consider adding a $20 tier please. Keep up the good fight man, for yourself and your family, and for all of us out here too.
David Harper
That sounds like savage bummer! Take care and don't sweat it. I'm not going anywhere (and I bet neither are most people) so do whatever you gotta do. Seriously. Appreciate the heads up too
Edmond Bastille
Take care mate, try to fix yourself up and do it right. Big hug and best wishes! And, btw, i, personally will gladly wait for the next video until you feel better. Take care
Nesadi
Take care of yourself first and take as long as you need. We're no better off if you keep pushing yourself and you burn yourself out and end up not being able to do any videos at all for months or even a year
William Willing
Take care of yourself, man. I can't speak for others, but I hope you don't switch to billing per video. I'm not here to buy your content; I'm here to support you, especially in times like this.
theycallmeboxy
I'm sure it's hard to feel in the moment but this isn't forever and you don't need to expect the worst from us. I will be around. Best wishes and good luck with your battle.
Fishi
Yo man I like your stuff, but don't neglect yourself, like, EVER. Please be lifelong. Big love & rest well
Talia Rock
Do what you need to do. No content is worth your health, not even a little bit. We'll be here and more will replace those who leave.
Daniel Genn
Dude mental health comes first, cause if that’s not right everything else is fucked to start with. Do what you need to do to get yourself right, we will still be here when you are ready.
Hatey
Don't worry about us my dude ❤️