Post "EARLY ACCESS: We're Evil Now (Once Upon a Time Season 5 Recap)" by "Haley Whipjack"

The Wizard Sea

I am pretty certain at this point that I only loved the dark swan arc brcause I love Emma's Camelot fit and also how sad she is. But ALSO that line "I'm not nothing I was never nothing. The power you have I don't need!" Is so! I love Emma swan with my whole heart.

Haley Whipjack

the Exact vibe i want to be hitting, thank you

Chelsea Souder

Every time you say "You remember [so-and-so]," I feel like an adult child getting re-introduced to a random person from my childhood, like my mom is standing in front of me with her arm around a middle-aged woman's shoulders, explaining that this person taught my second grade Sunday school class or something.

Roman Lanslide

I've started compulsively saying "Hey ladies????" every time something gay happens in something I'm watching, even if it's not wlw.

Jasmin Ella

Haley babes is there a way you can make these accessible as podcast episodes or audio files so I can listen to them while I’m driving? I’m new to patreon so this may have already been asked, my bad if it has, I just love these videos so much haha

Moon Noodles

I look forward to for the season 6 recap and how Haley will handle the wish realm (aka when everyone gets duplicated)

Arthur Murphy

thank you for fixing my name in the credits

Raven Rey

also Emma has like a bunch of additional light power sources: she's the child of true love, the Saviour and also the seed of her darker impulses was torn out of her before she was even born. and I also liked the scene where she tells off Nimue "I am not nothing I was never nothing". She is a powerful light magic caster and she's fulfilled, Rumple absolutely wasn't, he was noone without magic and he firmly believed that

ethan

two of my favorite things this season is violet morgans dad is hank morgan who is the main character of “a connecticut yankee in king arthur’s court” which they say in the show and i never read into it until i was in the play and also doctor wales actor is a very main character in izombie in which he had to be blond for because he was a zombie, and this season izombie came out the same year so they probably filmed around the same time and that’s why he’s randomly blond

Mimi

also! every time you said james charming i thought you were gonna say james charles 💀

Mimi

there is GREAT fanfiction about the two reginas and emma just saying….

babie boy

In my head, the key difference between Rumple and Emma as Dark Ones lies in their strength of character. Emma is fundamentally a stronger person than Rumple, as seen in 5x01 when she resists the Darkness's attempts to make her commit evil acts. In contrast, Rumple’s origin story as the Dark One shows him as someone easily manipulated by Zoso, with cowardice defining much of his personality. I’m also not a fan of how Dark One Emma isn’t truly evil, but I think there’s an explanation to it.

zeldas

wish that they would have stuck to season 1 naming conventions, ie snow white and prince charming naming their daughter "emma," the blandest and most popular girls name of 2011- truly like the writers looked up "girl names" and went with the first search result. chefs kiss. in my version of the show baby prince neal is actually named aidan or liam and baby robin is like... isabella.

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

I have literally had to rewatch the bit about the 2part finale like 5 times now because my brain just keeps refusing to process it

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

Was the OUAT musical episode created around the same time that like, every show suddenly had to have a musical episode, no matter how weirdly shoehorned in? At least OUAT has the Disney movies being musicals as kind of a handwavy explanation l...

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

I am still waiting for Haley to introduce the Chronological Timeline of all the Realms WhiteBoard that will make sense of all of these kind of questions.

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

It's a completely unsatisfactory lost thread, particularly with what Gold does to Milah

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

Excalibur being The Holy Grail but also the Underworld is ruled by Hades and Olympus is real and ruled by Zeus has thrown me for such a damn loop, I honestly just cannot

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

It is worse. She straight up assaulted Robin and is now naming the child after her victim. And everyone acts like this is a sweet tribute?!?! No?? Why?? Just no!

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

I had to legitimately run to the OUAT fandom wiki and look up Sean Maguire's appearances and spoil myself to see if this bullshit was true and it IS and I am SO OFFENDED on Regina's behalf. Go off Queen, JFC.

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

This was a delight to watch, with no knowledge of Season 5, because with every word out of Haley's mouth I was like "What? They did... NO. Omg WHO showed up? You're kidding. WOW"

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

What was the other major show was he in?!?!?! But having not seen this season when it aired, I did give a little cheer when I heard that he appeared briefly!

Megan Elizabeth Cobb

How can you not love Sark????

Deborah Endris

the only other thing I've seen him in was so far removed from his role here and the tone of onceuponatime. it was around the time season 7 was airing actually, i was flipping through TV channels and went hey! it's Neal! but why is he in a dark alleyway? what do these shady guys want from him? oh no. oh NO they told him to bite off one of his own fingers and he couldnt do it :( im gonna look into what else he's been in!

Deborah Endris

AHHH it's on my bucket list!

JaaMan02

Missed opportunity to put "dark one" on Emma and "dark two" on Hook

JaaMan02

Great video btw!

JaaMan02

So my interpretation of how the dark one curse effects people is that it pretty much only makes the person more selfish, therefore enhancing some of the more repressed personality traits in them. Both Gold and Emma are effected very differently with the main similarity being that they want to take the shortest and easiest path to what they see as their happy ending, we see Gold end the ogre war so his son doesn't have to fight, this act is pretty not evil just selfish. He Immediately becomes much more threatening and less cowardess, able to not only protect himself but his son too. This feeling of power becomes so intense he rejects his son and his true love to keep it (selfish). When it comes to Emma and how she is effected by overwhelming selfishness it all revolved around her family and the people she loves. One of the first things we see is Gold as the manifestation of the darkness tell her to kill Marida for the wisp, that is the fastest way for her to get what she wants which is to go back to her family. Her ideal happy ending doesn't come from not being a coward like Gold, her selfish happy ending includes Henry and Hook being happy with her. The other main similarity between them is how they go about getting what they want, it's always lies and secrets being conniving and manipulative to ththe people they love even if what they are doing is to benefit tthose people. However this is all just ramblings and speculations

Annie Bonus

Fun fact: most of Once Upon a Time is actually not filmed on a set but on-site in Steveston, BC, Canada. Granny's is a real cafe (called the Cannery cafe) and you can go there and eat which I did around a year ago during a free morning on my trip to Vancouver. Walking around downtown was very surreal and very cool- I highly recommend if you're a fan of the show and are ever in the area

Jordan Brauer

Ruby's my favorite character of the show hands down, and since this is that last we see her, while that makes me sad, it's a good ending for her. I'm happy for her. I could give two figs who's she's with. I barely know Dorothy, though I like how she was portrayed this one time we see her. I'm glad she's not Mulan. Do I wish it Dr. Frankenstein with the Big Bad Wolf. Yes. I love him, too. Mostly the actor, I don't think he's played a character I didn't love. But I digress.

Agumame

I cannot properly put into words how much I like Neal just because I think his actor is great and Im endlessly frustrated that in the two major shows Ive seen him in they write him off so much earlier than many other characters Id rather they write out

Vesper Sinclair

Mila calling Emma out and Emma grappling with her web of relationships because this is genuinely the first time she's ever thought about it is sending me

Billie Connors

also loved her in hannibal

J

As someone who stopped watching at season 4, I cannot WAIT to dig into this, especially after a particularly rotten day. Praise be to our Whipjack <3

Deborah Endris

and when belle decided to sleeping curse herself so hades couldnt get the baby! yes you go girl! cant wait to see haley's reaction to what happens with that in season 6.

Deborah Endris

spoilerrr i really hated it for however long zelena was holed up in the town hall with hades, and it was possible that she would believe him lying to and manipulating her. i guess in this show true love does not equal healthy love (see: belle and rumplestiltskin)

Deborah Endris

what was stealthy's unfinished business

Deborah Endris

spillers emma's stance as she looks away from zelena and hades kissing is hilarious

Deborah Endris

why did james charming try to steal zelena's baby

Deborah Endris

the "i can fix him" mindset has a bad track record in reality too

Deborah Endris

i really appreciate the water droplet and yellow circles

Deborah Endris

"and toto, who is still a regular dog don't worry about it" am i missing something???

Deborah Endris

spoiled hades agreeing to renounce the claim on the baby if belle's husband and her ex fight and one of them kills the other, regardless of who, is so funny. reminds me of the cavern in neverland that would only let the heroes get to neal if they each revealed their deepest, darkest secret. the type of dilemmas found in fanfiction (which i suppose onceuponatime is in some ways!)

Deborah Endris

if archie gets the additional name of roger for being pongo's caretaker, then (spoiler) zelena gets the name persephone for being hades' love 😆

Deborah Endris

sppoil this show runs out of things to do with snow and charming and has them kiss other people for no reason

Roman Lanslide

bailee madison enjoyers arise!!!!!!!

Deborah Endris

SPOILERS the reveal that belle is pregnant was so dramatic though it had me on the edge of my seat that first time i saw it

Deborah Endris

also if they gave us the flashback to gold's second child deal, AFTER we saw milah's superdeath, that makes it so much worse! she's more sympathetic knowing how trapped she felt as his wife

Deborah Endris

"mr gold based moments compilation or what have you" 😂 fr tho they did not have to do milah like that!

Deborah Endris

"hook doesnt do it, obviously. why would he if he could just not do that, nothing happens if he doesn't" i think the implication was that hades would torture him more which is how he ends up in the saw trap

Deborah Endris

spoilies somebody check Henry's heart for black spots cuz if the pen had a soul does that mean he murdered it???

Deborah Endris

bailee madison is young snow white and yes! she's perfect!!

Deborah Endris

i never liked hades either

Deborah Endris

do yall think the dead need to eat or they just have diners for funsies

Deborah Endris

tell me the truth. did you successfully say "james charming" every time or did you say "james charles" again (truly one of my favorite moments of an earlier ouat video)

Deborah Endris

2:11:07

Deborah Endris

emma's reaction to seeing neal again was... idk girl you're on your way to the underworld to save your boyfriend, the man you embraced the darkness to save and all that other stuff we just went through in 5A- and now neal's here, and he's saying things like "just an old friend checking in" and very intentionally places his kiss on her forehead. but then she goes in with no small amount of yearning emma what are you doing? and when he gets out of the car she tries to follow him! im just saying. maybe it was intentional?

Deborah Endris

it's the twilight walk

Deborah Endris

i will contemplate this, thank you for your positivity Daniel! wait. Daniel??

Deborah Endris

and then he's left tearing at the hotel bedsheets trying to recover the box, just like he was left tearing at the forest floor after he let Baelfire go. he does this to himself.

Deborah Endris

thank you for this i LOVE the parallels also stop motion?? that's amazing!

Haley Whipjack

I was just patiently waiting for you to get to the reveal, im so sorry

Haley Whipjack

yessss I absolutely needed to put the visual in there because it’s so crazy that he’s like this

Roman Lanslide

I haven't finished the video yet, but with a heavy heart I'm calling it- Zelena is going to name her baby Cora. I'll be so mad if that's actually what they do but I'm so certain about it. Edit: Somehow the reality feels worse. Are you kidding me

Michael West

My new conspiracy theory: On the preview for the first half I commented that the show should end with Henry having the world’s weirdest polycule of parents. I think writers of this show saw that comment (because they’re obviously patrons hey I see you how’s it going?) and went back in time and killed Robin Hood about it because they hate to see me having a good time

Avery Little

truly TRULY obsessed with season 5b. ALSO CANNOT LET IT BE FORGOTTEN THAT NEAL DOES ASK HOW THEIR SON IS DOING !!! also i disagree i think that emma DOES take on an orpheus role, thats the entire impetus of this arc, marching all the way down to hell for hook, and it makes me crazyyyyyyyyyy, i went on a whole rant to my friends (who have not watched ouat) last year when i rewatched that arc, one Tiny excerpt from that being "eurydice lies to orpheus that theyll find another way, and as they reach the path out of the underworld she holds his face and tells him he needs to go and live. orpheus weeps and says he does not know how to say goodbye. eurydice says they both know theyve already had far more time together than they should have." also for any musical fans here if this were hadestown this arrangement would make mr gold hermes. and i think thats fucking hilarious. anyways this was posted right after finals week and right before sonic 3 comes out so thank you SO MUCH for feeding my autism truly i could not have finished my two stop motion finals without the other ouat videos.

chronic_escapee

I *love* the visual storytelling of, as the portal hits Gold’s hotel room to pull Pandora’s Box through, there’s the Crystal and the Box: visual representations of Magic and Belle. And EVEN THOUGH he could have gotten both of them (he’s closer to the box than the crystal and it takes a second to open the portal under the box even after he makes it across the room) he ALWAYS goes for the magic, leaving Belle by the wayside. If he had just put *her* first, ONCE, he could have both of the things he loves. But he won’t.

Roman Lanslide

Why is "Hercules was Snow White's first kiss" the thing that has thrown me off the most this whole time. Maybe second to "the dark one daggar is Excalibur and also the Holy Grail".

Haley Whipjack

yeah I backwardsed it, the children killed her

Haley Whipjack

they loved him SO much it’s crazy that there is no catharsis or solid ending for them at all

Jasmine

also an absolute travesty that neal wasn't alive by this point, just IMAGINE him getting to reunite with milah

Jasmine

can't stop thinking about how both rumpelstiltskin and milah spent centuries trying to make up for having failed baby baelfire, they really loved that kid

Timothy Newton

I fear I will never be able to forgive the writers for what they did to Robin Hood. COMPLETELY UNCALLED FOR. CRUEL.

Sam Levesque

i feel like dr whale being that blond means this must've happened during his izombie run, another really dumb show that is wonderful and should be talked about more

Ed Slushie

Sorry to nitpick but I think you misspoke at 2:13:47 because either I’m remembering some stuff very wrong or she did not kill Hansel and Gretel

Sarah Sunshine

my favorite part about season 7 (and the only thing that kept me watching it at all at that point) is tilly, aka alice 2.0. and she wasn’t even in all the episodes!

Daniel Enns

season 7 is weirdly charming to me. I love a lot of the new cast (AU Alice is a gem and I will die to protect her) and it's interesting to have actual mysteries.

Trashley

Also it is funny that you put the blind witch on the board but never with her red X

Trashley

Also totally the reason for dark one rumple in 5a, they just wanted to put Robert in that lizard make up and have him do his silly hand motions he apparently took from the comedia del arte

Trashley

I feel reasonably confident that they did the hyde serum evil queen because they just wanted to dress Lana up in the old EQ outfits and let her act villainous for a while since she is fully redeemed these days

Mystic Yetirus

Did I just subscribe so that I can watch this as I wrap presents instead of waiting for it to drop on YouTube. Yes I did.

Raven Rey

Reusing the names is very royal of them btw, no imagination, just a dozen guys with identical names. Robin's daughter is Robin, Henry is named after his grandfather by the Evil Queen, his uncle-brother is named after his father. But usual people (Hook's dad) apparently can't do that. Insane all the way

Raven Rey

oh yeah, 5b introduces my third favorite dimension - Kansas! or is it implied that Dorothy was always from a normal one? That just can't be right also hasn't it been over thirty years since she was a child in a confrontation with Zelena? She can't be in her 20s in modern day Oz. The curse and all?

Deborah Endris

if you dont want to watch season 7 dont do it 😂 i promise that doesnt make you a coward

Haley Whipjack

I will find a way!!

Haley Whipjack

Noooooo I cannot believe I didn’t even think about that. I suppose they’ll have to get added to the next one

Haley Whipjack

god that is something I would do

AceWitt

I hate season seven with all of my heart and soul, and personally refuse to consider it canon

Deborah Endris

the fact that zelena voluntarily followed her baby through the portal makes me almost like her

AceWitt

Oh god I forget how much I hated Cora going to a better place. Absolutely atrocious.

Michael West

When I tell you I started cackling so hard I had to pause the video at the reveal of Hades’s lost love of his life. This is the best show ever made I think

AceWitt

Did anyone like Hades? No, no one liked him.

Ji dem

I commented that on the YouTube videos, but since it's the last time we're going to see Neil I wanna repeat it just once : since Baelfire got adopted by the Wendells in Victorian London, Wendy and her brothers should be on the family tree

Alex Watts

That and "I have some suggestions for what Ruby, Mulan and Dorothy could do together, and it does involve head"

The Plum Satyr

For a second I thought you were gonna say Felix was the season's biggest loser

The Wizard Sea

I desperately need to say that the Megara they cast, Kacey Rohl, played such an unbelievably hot murder witch in one of my favorite shows that I recommend no one watch, The Magicians. Had they given her literally anything to do here, she would've eaten that role up.

Mitchemditchem

Take a shot every time "the whole time" gets said, except please don't your kidneys will melt

Kazran

Yesss! We have been blessed this rizzmas! Anyway i look forward to learning what happens in this season that my brain erased from my memory even though I know i watched it when it came out! Only good things i suspect!

Moon Noodles

SO MANY THOUGHTS!! Season 5b had a similar format of introducing characters and having a resolution for them in each episode like season 1... Only it's characters we kinda don't care about, forgot about, or NEVER FORGOT ABOUT!!! I will never forgive them for casually letting Cora go to heaven! Also totally agree Hades was BAD and I hated his relationship with Zelena! The whole casting for the Greek mythology based characters was so off. Side bar: for some reason I totally thought baby hood was named Robyn with a Y to make it "girly" and also "different" from Robin?! I have genuinely been rewatching your videos on repeat in anticipation for this video! Good luck with the Jekyll and Hyde arc of season 6a, the Dark Fairy arc of season 6b (aka mommy issues), the musical episode (I would consider a beast unto itself), and season 7!!

Alix

it's such a small moment but emma telling regina that hook's brother thinks she's not good enough for hook and regina saying "actually you're TOO good for hook" lives in my brain rent-free always. also i'm SO with you, i'm never not mad that cora went to heaven. what do you MEAN cora went to heaven!!! the murderer and child abuser??? she gets to go to heaven???? having done absolutely nothing to redeem ANY of her past misdeeds or change her behavior or make real amends with ANYONE????? also. i too did not like the 2 part finale, but regina saying "fuck it, i might not have magic but i still have a fist and rumple still has a face" is like. top 5 hottest things i've ever seen lmao. she deserves to punch him in the face so bad. and the swan queen moments are just SO--like why are they always so Like That??? like my thing is. if they hadn't killed off robin, i might've been ok with emma and regina not canonically being in love. i could've been content as long as regina and robin were happy and cute. but they permakilled him, and somehow that makes all the swanqueen queerbaiting feel even more egregious (and you're so right, we do deserve a swan queen roadtrip every season) i'm interested to see what you think of s6 and s7--s6 is so weird to me bc so much of it is like. truly truly awful, perhaps the worst ouat has ever been, but then they do just a couple of things that rock so hard and i'm like?? how???? and then i have very different opinions from most people about s7, because i actually really liked a lot about s7 and really enjoyed watching it for the most part anyway. another great video!! thank you for powering thru the suffering of s5 for us all

Evan Linden

Oh my God my name is In the video for the first time

digimaniac33

OKAY NOW THAT I'VE ACTUALLY WATCHED THE THING best line's gotta go to 'henry sent his pen to hell', what a truly quintessential ouat kinda line, you only get that kinda sentence here folks i'm surprised that i never actually watched the gay ruby episode, but i think it was maybe just not available easily when i heard about it? and then i kinda forgot it existed i guess (which is a shame because yeah it does seem like a really well done sapphic storyline) with the ever-so-exciting two-parter finale, i do remember a bit of what happens in season six now (though even in the middle of this video i was having a hard time remembering the underworld is in season five), and i do know there is at least one episode i've seen in season six (though not the musical episode - i might have watched that one and forgotten it though) anyway, you're doing an incredible job, and you've got just the two seasons to go! and, as someone who never watched half of season five or almost any season six, i will tell you that i have watched season seven more than once, so your sisyphean task may be less daunting than you fear once you get to it

Billie Connors

"...and 'stuff', thy name is felix" send me to the underworld bc that killed me😭

Arianna Collier

Having somehow made the whole way through all seven seasons with my family back when it was airing, it is always a treat to see just how much I forgot. I remembered exactly two things from this season: Snow getting very concerned that they had a regular order at the Hell dinner and that KISS!!!!

Shakesqueer

Hold it! The rule for the board is named child or christian marriage, so where are Roland and Marian?

Sarah Sunshine

also roland and maid marian aren’t on the family wreath. idk how there would be any room for them tho without getting super crazy with the layering

digimaniac33

let's gooooooooo (should i be going to sleep because i have work tomorrow? perhaps)

Sarah Sunshine

3:07:18 you say hades fuses the pages when i think you probably meant hook. sorry to nitpick, i just know that if it was me making this video it would bug me as soon as i noticed it after uploading it to the internet forever

Rowan C

I would ABOSLUTELY read a web series of Stanford and Belle healing from their controlling manipulative amoral exes. 10/10 take

Sarah Sunshine

“chewing on the scenery” is such a fun thing to say about a woman whose house was made of food lol

Michael West

I recently started watching this with some friends and there’s a moment like 2 minutes in to episode 1 where Regina crashes Snow’s wedding, goes “Sorry I’m late!” and then very awkwardly walks on a green screen. Anyway that’s me clicking on every Patreon upload

Sophia S

I love how the exhausting pattern of characters needing too many name tags also extends to the inanimate objects like the Dark One Dagger

Haley Whipjack

oh thank GOD

FoolerywithNorrie

I will tell you now I was not active in the fandom but as an opinionated 13 year-old I hated Hades too

Haley Whipjack

oh HUGE congrats on getting through finals!!

Evan Linden

Bless you. I love your recaps but I think if possible I hated Dark Swan more than you did

Haley Whipjack

2:09:34!

Haley Whipjack

no no no, im well aware that that's a huge part of it

Evan Linden

Can we get a time stamp for those who have already seen the Dark Swan half?

Babbity Kate

FABULOUS timing! I’ve been watching part 1 in bite-sized chunks with my sibling and we just finished 🥰 Is it bad to say I’m enjoying how upset you are