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The Big Oof! Volume 2 Chapter 55: A Surprise Vistor
🕑 Added 2023-08-08 08:51:27 +0000 UTC“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say those guards thought we were responsible for the missing serfs when we brought them those heads…” Bennett complained with dreary eyes as he and the rest of the crew walked down the street towards their inn.
A groan of agreement was echoed by Elijah as he followed close behind. "I know, right? We're the ones who bothered to go out there and find out what actually happened, and they treat us like criminals." He grumbled while his arms hung lazily to the side.
Azeline, who was walking beside them, just shook her head. "To be fair it’s hard to blame them when we bring evidence of Kobolds and Skalbolds working together." She said, her voice equally exhausted as the others. “It turns things on its head and they’re probably going to have to send an entire detachment out to investigate.”
Both of the humans simply grunted in response. After a long and arduous day, their minds were just too tired to engage with the thought of whatever complicated mess they just uncovered. The only thing they wished was to completely divorce themselves from the situation, but they knew they were knee deep in this.
So Bennett and Elijah did the next best thing; Ignore it until it became their problem again.
"Whatever, let’s just get back to the tavern," Elijah finally sighed, breaking the silence. “It’s late and I want some food.”
Yana’s ears perked up at the mention of food as she fluttered from her perch on Elijah's shoulder. "Food!?" she exclaimed, her wings buzzing in excitement. "You promised me delicious food! What are you going to get me!?" She asked, her eyes sparkling with anticipation.
Elijah scowled tiredly at her as he tried to decipher what this damned little thing was saying to him before sighing in recollection. “Fuck… that’s right…” He murmured, knowing it was far too late for any street vendors in the nicer parts of town to be open.
Sliding a hand down his face, Elijah did his best to come up with a solution. "Alright, alright," he said, raising his hands in surrender. "I got something for you in my room you’ll love.” The man said, knowing what he was going to give her was most likely going to be a terrible idea.
Suddenly Bennett came to a stop with a hand to his chin. “Wait, weren’t we supposed to meet Rhea before she left today or something?” He said, furrowing his brow.
Stopping right next to his engineer, Elijah's eyes widened before slapping his other hand into his face. "Fuuuuuuuuuck….." he moaned, almost painfully. “Today is so SHIT.”
Azeline, who had been quietly following behind them, sighed and walked ahead. "You two are absolutely hopeless," she said, shaking her head.
It was long until they found themselves staring down at a familiar scene just outside of the gouged tavern doors. The very same hulking anthropomorphic beast stood, blocking the way and sizing them up with a scowl on his face.
“Ye still running around with these ‘ere welplin’s?” The thing said in a condescending manner. “I thought ye better of that when I learned who ye were.”
Elijah, who was already in a foul mood, didn't have the patience to deal with the creature's taunts. "Bro, I’m about to hit this guy.” He said looking at Azeline and Bennett. “I’m just letting you know, that I swear to god, I’m gonna hit him.”
Bennett sighed, rubbing eyes with one hand. "Eli, can we… can we just not?” He basically sighed out. “Can we NOT add 'bar fights' to the list of stupid shit we've dealt with today?" he asked, equally exasperated.
But it was Azeline that walked towards the large beast with both of her arms crossed. "If you don’t move, I’m going to stab you in the balls."
The creature blinked, taken aback by her straightforward threat. He looked her up and down, sizing her up. "You? Stab me?" He scoffed, a smirk playing on his lips. "I know ye be tough but- ARGHH!!" The beast screamed out in pain as a blur rammed into his crotch.
With lightning speed, Azeline had grabbed her still sheathed dagger and rammed it into the creature's groin. Not enough to cause any serious damage, but enough to make him drop to his knees and whimper sheepishly.
"Next time, I won't be so kind," she warned, her voice icy as she shoved the dagger and its wooden scabbard back into place. The creature could only let out a high pitched and pained cry as he doubled over, bridging his face to the ground while clutching his nether regions.
Both Elijah and Bennett physicalled cringed and recoiled as Azeline brushed past the unfortunate soul and his pose of scared Freelancers and barged into the tavern. After a moment, Elijah let out a low whistle. "Sucks to suck, dipshit." he chuckled eliciting a chortle from the fairy on his shoulder
The little menace then immediately shot out and floated just above the creature's head and pointed down. “AHAHAHA SUCKS TO SUCK! SUCKS TO SUCK!!!” Yana cackled, her wings fluttering in delight as she orbited the groaning beast.
Walking past their unwelcomed obstacle, the crew finally found themselves bombarded with the cacophonous and lively atmosphere of the tavern. The smell of ale, sweat, and food filled their nostrils as they navigated through the crowd of patrons. Laughter, shouting, and the clinking of mugs echoed around them, a stark contrast to the quiet and tense atmosphere outside.
"Finally," Elijah sighed, running a hand through his hair as he scanned the room for an empty table. "Let's find a spot and get some food."
Yana, who had finally caught up, lightly yanked on Elijah’s hair with an anticipating look. "Your promise! I want your promise!" she yelled, her voice barely audible over the noise.
Elijah winced as Yana tugged at his hair, turning to look at her with a raised eyebrow. "OKAY!, fuck me…" he said, trying to pry her fingers from his hair. "I remember, I remember! I'll get it when we find a table, okay?"
The fairy's face beamed in excitement as she finally let go of his hair. "OKAY!" she replied, her eyes sparkling with anticipation.
Bennett and Azeline just stood there shaking their heads before wandering forward and navigating through the dense cacophony of noise and activity. If Bennett were to describe it, then he would attribute this place to be nothing more than a wretched hive of scum and villainy that housed all manner of mercenaries, thieves, and other unsavory types.
Every corner of the room was filled with patrons, their loud voices merging into a constant, unintelligible drone and the group ended up having to step over someone's former dinner. The sight made them all grimace, but they all were used to this kind of environment.
“Not seeing any tables…” Bennett growled when they all finally reached the doors that lead to the kitchen. Turning around and scanning his surroundings the engineer found that the noise was much more tolerable on this side of the tavern after seeing the bulk of the clamor was concentrated near the walls and the door.
Seeing the same issue, Azeline let out a frustrated sigh and walked over to the kitchen doors. With a determined look on her face, she banged heavily on the wooden surface. The noise was loud enough to momentarily drown out the cacophony of the tavern, drawing the attention of several patrons before they went back to their business. But soon, the door violently swung open, revealing a giant scowling and burly man with bull horns and a greasy apron. "What be this racket about?" he grumbled, his eyes narrowing at Azeline.
"Go get Ulina." Azeline stated, her tone leaving no room for argument.
The Bullman blinked, taken aback by her straightforward demand. "Ulina?" he echoed, scratching his head. "Why would I-"
"Just do it," Azeline interrupted, her patience wearing thin. "Tell her Azeline is here."
Turning his head eyes to the side in thought, the Bullman’s eyes flashed in recognition. "Azeline?" he repeated, before nodding his head. "Aye, right. I’ll go fetch her."
Without another word, the Bullman disappeared back into the kitchen, leaving the group standing just outside waiting while Barmaids bustled around them, entering and exiting the kitchen while carrying trays of food and drink. The noise level dropped slightly as the door swung shut, but the atmosphere remained lively and chaotic.
A few moments later, the door swung open again, and the white haired Aethari woman they were looking for stepped out. This time her hair was pulled back into a tight bun, and she wore a simple apron that had food splattering all over it.
“Azeline!” Ulina said, raising her hands for a hug, but quickly dropping them remembering she was covered in grease and food. “Oh um… I’m assuming your first job went well?”
Azeline nodded, returning the greeting with a big smile. "Ulina! It went as well as it could have," she said, her tone dry. "We’ll talk more about it when you’re free."
Ulina brow furrowed, sensing that something had gone horribly wrong glanced around the crowded tavern, her eyes narrowing slightly. "I see… That doesn’t sound good." she said, her tone thoughtful. "Oh! Right! Follow me!” The white haired woman said as she directed them towards a table that sat a lone patron nursing an ale.
Walking toward the lone patron, Ulina gestured for Azeline and the rest of the crew to take a seat at the table. As they approached, the person seated turned their head, causing their long black hair to sway slightly, revealing their deep red eyes.
“Rhea?” Elijah uttered in surprise.
“Ah, Sir Elijah. Greetings!” She said with a soft smile and flushed cheeks from the alcohol.
"Rhea," Elijah responded, returning her smile as he and the rest of the group took a seat at the table "Didn't expect to see you here. How did you find us?"
Rhea shrugged, her red eyes twinkling with mirth. "I have my ways." she replied coyly, taking a sip from her mug. “Looking for large tailless primate with a northern Aethari woman and a chaotic, but small ‘Pixie’ isn’t a particularly difficult task." The Knight Captain said, tapping her finger on the table.
Elijah let out a hearty laugh, placing his head in his hand as he rested his elbow on the table. "I suppose not," he admitted, glancing at his companions. "But, I’m sorry we couldn’t make it to your departure… We were,uh. Otherwise engaged.”
Waving away his apology with a casual flick of her wrist, Rhea took another sip of her drink. "No need to apologize, Sir Elijah. I understand that you had your own matters to attend to," she said, her tone understanding. "Besides, my departure had been delayed.”
“It's nice to see you two flirting and all, but…” Azeline interjected, rolling her eyes. “What made you deem it necessary to find us? It can’t be that you just couldn’t handle departing without seeing your lover one last time.” She said with sarcasm oozing from her voice. After the long day, she found her more conservative and reserved sensibilities to be strained.
Even if the woman was from the inquisition.
Choking on her drink, Rhea’s face took on an even darker shade of red as she shot a glare towards Azeline. “T-That's not it at all!" she protested, her voice rising slightly in her embarrassment. "I'm here to discuss my findings!"
“How disappointing.” Elijah sighed, leaning back in his chair with a smirk. "And here I thought you came all this way just to see me."
"Sir Elijah!" she exclaimed, her voice a mixture of exasperation and embarrassment. "I am here on official business, not for... for whatever you're implying!"
Sitting there with a look that said he was just done with the situation, Bennett’s blank gaze shot between both Elijah and Rhea. “Jesus Christ, can you two just fuck already.?” He said in agitation as he turned towards a passing barmaid and raised his hand. “I had a long day, and the last thing I need is… THIS.” The engineer turned back and gestured with both hands towards the two after realizing every barmaid was busy.
Ulina laughed as she stood up to go fetch some food for them, but Bennett's blunt words caused a momentary silence to fall over the table while Rhea looked like she was about to spontaneously combust. Her body was shaking and her eyes were wide with shock and embarrassment. "Sir Bennett!" she exclaimed, her voice a high-pitched squeak. "That's... that's highly inappropriate!"
“I’m not opposed to this Idea.” Elijah, on the other hand, leaned back and clasped his fingers together as he looked at Rhea with a mischievous grin.
Rhea sat there shocked, her mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water before calm struck her. "This was a mistake,” she said quietly, standing up from the table as her eyes swam and darted all over the place. “I shall take my leave.”
As she turned to escape, Elijah reached out and gently grabbed her wrist. "Wait! Wait, we’re just teasing!" he said quickly with a slightly apologetic tone. "Come on, sit down. You said you found something?"
With eyes darting between Elijah's sincere face and his hand on her wrist, Rhea sucked in a deep breath of air and slowly exhaled, her shoulders dropping as she did so. She gave a curt nod, pulling her wrist free from his grasp and sitting back down. "Yes, I did," she said, with a red face, but a steady voice. "Do you all remember the ship captain we took into custody last night? Well, this morning we found him dead, foaming at the mouth."
The table fell silent as they all processed the news. The ship captain, a burly man with a gruff exterior, was the last person they expected to be dead. "Dead?" Azeline echoed as confusion etched her face. "But how? He was in custody, wasn't he?"
Rhea nodded, her expression grim. "Yes, he was. But it seems like he was poisoned. We found he had removed a false tooth and bit down on some deathroot."
“So he committed suicide.” Bennett added sitting back in his chair. He didn’t know what deathroot was, but with a name like that, he could put two and two together.
"Indeed, he did," Rhea affirmed, her eyes fixated on the wooden grains of the table. "But that's not the end of it. It seemed the crew of the ship we inspected set fire to the thing, and it's still ablaze," she continued, her voice laced with a cocktail of vexation and concern. "The real question, however, is the motive. Why would he choose to end his own life and why would the crew ignite their own ship? What secrets are they trying to bury?"
The table fell silent as they all digested the information. What could be so damning that they'd rather die and destroy their own ship than let it be discovered?
The question hung in the air, heavy and foreboding, as they each considered the implications. Elijah was the first to break the silence, his voice low and thoughtful. "They must have offloaded it by the time we got there," he mused, his brow furrowed in thought. "And if I’m not mistaken, ships are extraordinarily expensive, right?" Elijah’s gaze shifted between Azeline and Rhea.
"Indeed, they are," Rhea confirmed, her expression serious. "A ship is a significant investment for even a Lord or an entire merchant Guild and to destroy one willingly... whatever they were hiding must have been worth more than the ship itself."
"Or worth not having the Inquisition on your ass.” Bennett interjected, leaning back in his chair with a neutral expression.
Everyone looked towards Bennett with raised eyebrows.
Elijah however just scratched his beard, building upon his Engineer's earlier comment “ Ya, they may have just decided it was better to lose the ship than having an investigation turn over whatever else you were doing.” He said, stretching his neck to the side. “It must have been something that would bring down the bigger players or gut the entire guild, syndicate or whoever.”
Rhea nodded, her gaze distant. "That's a possibility," she agreed. "That’s a very distinct possibility…” The Knight Captain then ran a hand through her hair. “But, with the burning of the ship and suicide of its Captain, they have justified my extended stay to look into the matter.”
“Sure, but how long can you justify staying here? A week? A month" Elijah asked, his tone skeptical. "They may just be banking on waiting until you get bored and fuck off."
“Ya, especially since you have orders to do whatever it is you’re supposed to do.” Bennett added as he looked around for Ulina and his food.
Silence reigned for a few moments before Rhea ultimately sighed and hung her head over the table. "I can stay for maybe a week," she admitted. "But after that, they'll start asking questions, and I don't have the answers they'll want to hear."
"Well, that gives us a week to figure out how we're going to establish a reliable line of communication.” Elijah said as he watched Rhea slowly lift her head to meet his gaze. “If you can’t be here yourself, we can always investigate for you as your unofficial deputies," he suggested, a hint of a smirk playing on his lips. "Since we’re not associated with any kind of Law Enforcement entities, we'll be able to operate in a less... official capacity."
Everyone at the table snapped towards Elijah, giving him a look that clearly conveyed their surprise and skepticism. "Wait, what?" Azeline voiced what everyone was thinking as her eyebrows raised in disbelief. "What do you mean by we can operate in a less official capacity!? We’re not a part of the Inquisition!" She gestured vaguely towards Rhea, who just sat there equally confused.
Bennett, however, rested his elbows on the table and placed his head in his hands in an attempt to stave off the oncoming headache. He knew exactly what kind of conniving and underhanded tactics Elijah was suggesting. "Elijah, why are you the way that you are?" He groaned, his voice muffled by his hands. "Honestly, everytime I think things are going to get a little less complicated, you… make it not that way."
Looking up so his chin was resting on his hands, Bennett glared at Elijah with such hostility, everyone wondered how the man didn’t just drop dead right then and there. “I hate… so much about the things that you choose to be.”
A snicker slipped from Yana and broke the awkward silence. Everyone’s gaze then turned to the little fairy who sat squarely in the middle of the table, casually nibbling on a piece of bread that had seemingly appeared out of nowhere.
Shaking her head and turning back to Elijah, Rhea narrowed her eyes as she considered the man’s words. "That’s something His Holiness' Spymaster would say." she replied, her tone disapproving but intrigued. "But I suppose shadow matters should be left to those that are most familiar. Very well… we shall discuss this in greater lengths tomorrow," Rhea concluded, her gaze sweeping over the group. "For now, let's enjoy the rest of the evening, I’m quite curious about your day!"
Just as Ulina unexpectedly returned to her seat with a pair of barmaids in tow who began distributing platters laden with roasted meats, fresh bread, and bowls brimming with hearty stew. The tantalizing aroma wafted through the air, eliciting a chorus of stomach growls and salivating looks. "Everyone, help yourselves!" Ulina declared, her hands coming together in a joyful clap. "Ale and wine are coming next!"
Bennett's eyes nearly bulged out of his head as his gaze snapped from the food to Ulina. "Wine!?" he exclaimed, his voice filled with a mix of surprise and anticipation. "There’s wine!?" His eyes were practically sparkling at the thought of a good drink after the long and eventful day.
A laugh escaped Elijah’s mouth as he pushed himself away from the table and stood up. “I’ll go get Auri, she’ll probably appreciate some food.”
“DON’T FORGET MY THING!” Yana suddenly yelled out when she saw Elijah heading towards the stairs. ELI! HEY! ELI!!!" she continued, her tiny voice seemingly dampened by the bustling noise of the tavern.
However, seeing the human simply trot up the stairs, The fair scowled and threw down her piece of bread to the side and chased after him. "Ugh, Idiot!" she snarled as she chased the man.
The rest of the group watched in amusement as the tiny fairy darted after Elijah, her wings buzzing angrily. "Well, let's eat shall we?" Azeline commented with a smirk playing on her lips.
Everyone simply chuckled and shook their heads while they all reached for the delicious looking food in front of them.
