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Chapter 31 - Sneaky Fox
🕑 Added 2024-05-05 19:36:52 +0000 UTCHad a weird bit of writer's block the last few days and had to force this chapter a little, which sucks because it's an important chapter.
I still like how it came out though, super fun. I've thought of how I was gonna do it for months and might make an alternate version omake at some point.
Have fun!
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Sitting at the library, her fingers can’t help but tap the table. She’s taken a day off from researching city building, something much more important has been on her mind. Trying to pry a little has never been her thing, she doesn’t have the basics of subtlety, but sneaking into the academy and stealing a copy of Naruto’s records was super easy. Sticking to her skills works a lot better than trying to be social about complex issues.
“October tenth…” She mumbles, looking through a records book. “Why do I recognize that date?”
First she’d looked up the Uzumaki clan, but all she could really get is their bloodline and that they’re super dead. They used to be allies with Konoha, known for their sealwork and endurance so great it was considered a bloodline, but that’s not particularly useful information. Naruto does have enhanced endurance but his endurance definitely isn’t from his clan. If it was, they wouldn’t be dead, and he’d have parents. Konoha would just be called Uzumaki, and there no one would give a flying fuck about Doujutsu it’d be all about that infinite chakra bloodline.
“Right, the Kyuubi attack.” She mumbles as she finds the tenth in the records book, “same year too, wow… What an unfortunate birthday, I imagine he doesn’t get a lot of celebrations.” Birthdays probably already suck being an orphan, she’d have to make this year’s birthday great for him. Maybe she’d learn how to bake, or more likely, beg her mother to make him a cake in her place. “That’s on me, I should have known that.” She hadn’t put the two dates together before, but the knowledge was there, everyone knows about the Kyuubi attack. Still, she reads through it a bit, only to realize a few things very quickly.
The Kyuubi is an infinite being of Chakra.
Naruto has infinite chakra.
The days coincide.
And her ability went and called him a fox. She opens the trait right away to reread it, “sneaky huh… like a kitsune.”
That’s too much coincidence for one Sakura, she has to ask.
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“Naruto!” Naruto looks up from his place wiping down a counter, only to spot Sakura walking in like she owns the place with muddy sandals and a book on the Kyuubi attack in her hands. It puts him on edge right from the start, firstly because he just mopped there, second, because he knows where this is going and he’s hella not liking it.
“Sakura?” He winces instinctively, eyes not moving from the book and its illustration of the horrifying beast.
“This is important, no lies.” Sakura asserts with a very straight expression, “did the Kyuubi fuck your mom?”
“... What?” He can’t help but blink at her as she manages to ask that with seriousness, and it’s enough to make his facial expression contort in ways he wasn’t prepared for. Her eyes shine with brilliance, like she’s found out some crazy new concept.
“Did you spawn into existence from the last Uzumaki getting railed by a demon beast? It’d explain so much.” She nods to herself, her hands jittering a bit.
“Sakura… No.” His brow furrows, and he has to drop the sponge he’s currently holding. “Where did you even get that idea?”
“Well the Uzumaki were known for incredible endurance - as in they can just handle pretty much anything - and the date coincides, and I imagine Kyuubi based seed would work instantly, and for some reason the Uzumaki don’t have a lot of records so I thought maybe the Kyuubi went and diddly’d them all and you’re not super well liked or cared for because you’re the spawn of a massive city destroying tragedy. It makes sense, people have gotten blamed for the deeds of their parents all throughout history.”
Every word sinks into his gut, reminding him of the wonderful fact that Sakura is an incredibly smart person, whose brain works sideways. No one would come to that conclusion, no one! And yet, she came to it, confidently, with ideas and even a little evidence to back it up. “Sakura, no.. I am not the Kyuubi’s rape baby.”
“I didn’t say it was rape, maybe your mother was a furry. It could be a happy union.” Sakura says, crossing her arms with an accusing pout. “Do you have proof your mother wasn’t diddlied by the Kyuubi?”
“Do you?” Naruto asks.
“What?” Sakura’s brow furrows.
“Do you have proof your mother wasn’t um, done, by the Kyuubi?” Naruto asks. “It’s a trickster, I bet it has a human form.”
“Oh, no, huh… I mean, I bet I’d have better stamina if that was the case.” Sakura ponders.
“Sakura, no…” Naruto’s expression cracks a little.
“Okay, I did think that was far fetched but you know, anything to make your existence a little happier.” Sakura sighs a little, waving a hand to the side. “Okay, sorry to bother you.” She turns away.
A million feelings well up in his chest, and he knows now is time. Well, maybe not time, but, there’s significantly worse times and she was just A-okay with ‘spawn of Kyuubi.’
“He’s in my belly.” He says, his voice tries to stop him and causes a nervous waver, his body cramps to prevent it, he gets the words out because Sakura is his friend. He speaks because he has to.
“Wha-” She spins on her heel wide eyed, just enough surprise in her to make him regret his decision, for the one moment it takes her to send an accusation - “you ate the Kyuubi?”
Just not the one he expected. She points right at him. “That’s a lot more than some Ramen, you were a gluttony baby!”
“Wha- no…”
“I know, I just thought it was funny, um.” She scratches her cheek. “So are you the Kyuubi incarnate or…”
“Why do you seem okay with that idea?” He narrows his eyes heavily, frowning at her.
“Well you’re my brother, that’d be kind of cool.” She admits.
“No, Sakura, I have it sealed within me, like a sane person.” He stares, unsure of how to even properly respond to that.
“Are you sure?” She asks. “Wasn’t even aware we could seal sentient beings, the Kyuubi’s sentient right? If it’s not we have to change some books, it can’t be a villain if it’s not a person. No one says lions are hilariously evil.”
“No.” He lets that sit. “That’s just what I’ve been told, I do not know enough about sealing to say with complete certainty, that I am not the Kyuubi.” It’s a little more refined than what he’d wanted to say, that phrase being ‘what the fuck Sakura’ but with great friendship comes the desire to see things work a little better.
“Good enough for me.” She approaches quickly, fast enough that his threat senses tingle, but he stands still because it’s Sakura and she promised - and he feels a sting on his face, followed by warm arms around him.
“Did you just slap me? You promised!” He grumbles, melting into his sister’s touch.
“I confessed my reality was an illusion and you couldn’t tell me about a demon inside you.” She points out, resting her face on his shoulder. “I’m mad at you. We could have done that dungeon so differently.”
“... You’re mad about the tactics?”
“I’m mad you didn’t trust me.” She huffs into his shoulder.
“Trust you with… Sakura, our situations aren’t the same. It’s not like I didn’t let you in on a secret hide-out, I have the Kyuubi inside of me and I know nothing of sealing.”
“No, it’s not the same.” She admits, “but secret for secret, that’s the sibling rules! I just assumed you didn’t have any.” She scolds. “It doesn’t matter if they’re equal, if you have any you have to spill when I spill!”
He rubs her back, because what the hell else is he going to say to that.
At least it wasn’t Sasuke confronting him, that’d be so much worse. “You’re still not supposed to hit me.” He points out.
“You hit me first, with your rule breaking, that’s how it works.” She mumbles. “Sorry though, you’re right.”
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“Mom, why don’t I have a little brother?” Sakura asks her parents, marching into the living room that evening with a book about parenting and reproduction in her hands. “Making one is easy, this book said so, I want a little brother.”
“Uh-Sakura that’s-” Mebuki trails, staring, “you know where babies come from, why did you get a book?”
“I wasn’t sure if you knew, maybe I was some kind of overly active slipping accident.” Sakura admits, “why aren’t you and dad having enough sex to give me a little brother?” She points at them, dramatically leaning backwards and looking at the both of them with accusing eyes. “Go back in time and do it more!”
“I-um.” Her mother flushes up a storm the likes of which she’s never seen her mom flush. It’s a lot, and she seems really, really embarrassed for some reason if the mood chart beside her head is any indication. “Sakura, you can’t just ask someone that. Especially not your mother.”
“But I want to know.” Sakura crosses her arms and leans against a wall for dramatic effect.
“You’ve withheld divine providence from me for too long!”
“What does that mean?” Mebuki asks with a snort.
“I dunno…” Sakura shrugs.
“But it sounded cool… And I wanna snuggle buddy.”
“Why not Naruto?” Mebuki asks.
“...” Sakura can’t help but stare at her awkwardly, luckily she’s staring back so their eyes match and it feels nice and not awkward. “He ran away last time I tried.” Sakura admits.
“Pfft-wha-hahahahaah!” That’s her father’s first contribution to this discussion, and Sakura can’t help but cross her arms harder at them with a thick and gloomy pout. “Sakura, your mother can’t have children. You wrecked her coming out.”
Sakura watches her mother punch her father’s arm. “I what?” Sakura asks.
“It’s not that uncommon, and as a genin she wasn’t given priority in the hospital when we went so we had a normal doctor.” Her father explains. “They messed up, and you did a lot of damage, and she’s such a small woman it just didn’t work out.”
“Couldn’t you get that fixed?” Sakura asks, looking between them.
“Yes.” Her mother admits, “but that’s a lot of money, and we’ve never had it.”
Sakura can’t help but feel bad about that. Not for wrecking her place, she didn’t ask to be born, that's not really her fault at all.
She feels bad because her parents don’t have a lot of money because they’ve never had the free time to take missions simultaneously with any distance. She’s held them back by being incredibly dependent on them, and for being a problematic shut-in that needed the care instead of staying over at Ino’s house.
“Ah… Sorry.” She looks down at her feet, smacking them together.
“No-Sakura, that’s not…” Mebuki sighs, “it’s not your fault, besides, adoption is a wonderful option I should have pursued sooner.”
“Maybe if I was less of a handful you would have thought of it.” Sakura mumbles.
“You, a handful? Yeah, okay.” Mebuki snorts. “Oh no, I had a quiet child who stuck to herself and stayed in front of a screen all day. Woe is me, my life was so hard needing to make sure you ate. Look, you’re a pain but you stay out of trouble, I could have been dealt much worse. Our neighbor’s daughter once chased their son around with freshly sharpened kunai.”
“It was training day.” Sakura points out. “We got new kunai.”
“We had to bribe you to open the pack.” Her father deadpans.
Comments
Christopher Cummins
She's a tripping based accident.
Dopplerdee
Sakura is a treasure.
Damon Fitzgerald
I have never heard of that theory before but it is hilarious. Great chapter. I must admit that last little bit has got me looking forward to Sakura meeting Ino again. We haven't seen much of her but what we have seen makes me think she might be another possible romantic partner for Sakura and now Sakura might be able to figure it out. Maybe. That has a lot of potential.
