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March Bonus Story #3 - Video

🕑 Added 2024-03-29 00:30:09 +0000 UTC

Comments

Becca

This story gave me the ick hard. Poor OP. She was totally taken advantage of. 💔

LZ

Not saying you’re wrong at all or anything against you, but it seemed like you got as invested in this story as I did and wrote out all of my original thoughts so I wanted to share. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk, good night.

LZ

I just wanted to share my thoughts because I feel like everyone excuses “horny male brain”, especially for teens, pretty easily (me included I excused the boyfriend way more quickly than the friend). But I actually think girls and women have a much more difficult time acknowledging and controlling “horny” brain. And that the sexual awakening aspect of being a teen is much more complex, frustrating, and difficult for females. Both the physical/chemical/hormonal parts (not a science so really idk) but also navigating what you’re “supposed” to do and feel. We no longer pretend that women don’t get horny, but in some ways we’ve over corrected in a way that’s slowly affecting young girls negatively similarly to how internet porn has had a toxic effect on young men’s relationships and ideas of sex.

LZ

I had a really similar take at first and was villainizing the friend for being so manipulative and creepy. But now (and I may be projecting) it seems like the friend has a warped view on sex/relationships, probably from her last experiences and maybe even trauma. Since they are young it’s easy for me to image that the friend legitimately thinks it’s normal bc of past weird situations she’s been in or a way to make a traumatic past experience normal by replicating it (proving to herself and others how great it was or reliving it with more control. At the very least I think the friend has some pretty intense insecurities and warped views around sex. I had a lot of internal conflict at the age of wanting to do and try things, but also not wanting to be or feel like a slut. Bc of this I used to self sabotage, seek out unfulfilling sex or put myself in potentially risky situations. I consented and made concessions I didn’t want to bc I didn’t want to “miss an opportunity” for a sexual experience I wanted to have but felt guilty about wanting. Putting myself in the friend’s shoes and not the OP’s (which was my first response bc those sort of memories are much stronger), fit me now I can believe that the friend may actually be remorseful, spiraling about what she has done and has now made her own ideas and experiences around sex even more fucked up.

june

God, I feel so bad for OP. This is so extremely traumatic on so many levels. I hope she is surrounded by nothing but loving people in her life.

Hallie Boorsma

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Annaliese

My boyfriend and I just had our first 3some weeks ago. And that’s not how it’s supposed to have happened or went for their first time. Way before we found another person we sat down and talked and discussed the possibility of everything that could happen and feelings we may feel for months. We talked for months about it before diving into one. As partners we kept checking in on each other over those months making sure this is want we both wanted and no pressure from either party. Even when it was all done we had multiple checks in on how we felt about it after the fact. I feel bad this is how she felt and gaslit herself in the moment that’s ok when it wasn’t! Poor op all the best to her!!

Kimberly Minto

I should also add that the boyfriend should take responsibility. It’s not all on the friend, I just think she played a big part by being the conductor of this whole shit show.

Kimberly Minto

Wow you said this in a shorter, more accurate way than I did lol. I agree with this

Kimberly Minto

I think the friend should take almost all responsibility here. She was definitely feeling the boyfriend and was trying to find an opening for months. She was probably thinking of ways to get his attention or sleep with him without losing her friend. I wonder if she could’ve slept with him without the friend knowing if she would’ve taken it. I guarantee she’s made minor flirty comments or shot him looks without the girlfriend noticing. I even bet after thinking of ways to get away with this she eventually came to the conclusion that the only way she could have him and keep her friendship was by initiating a threesome. I’m sure the girlfriend and her best friend were supposed to hang out and started drinking. She saw her window and went all in, completely manipulating everyone, and the friend suggested that the gf’s boyfriend comes to hang out with them. From there she was probably trying to find a subtle way to make a move towards the threesome. That’s why she was acting off and ‘scary’ and making sexual comments and asking sexual questions. Which is why it doesn’t surprise me that the girlfriend noticed that so much so that the next day when she was sober she felt it was a key detail to add when writing this post. I’m sure the gf or ex gf thought this was a little out of character for her friend. Also it seemed to be the two of them having sex most of the time instead of all 3 of them? And the gf woke up and saw them laying on the floor with blankets and pillows with out her? This was not a spontaneous act. This was selfishly and deliberately planned out by the friend for a while even when she was completely sober. Now she’s acting shocked and so scared of losing her best friend because she never thought something like that would happen but it just did and blah blah blah. I also noticed she made the comment of she feels like a slut or something along those lines and that comment screams projection bc she knows it’s true. She’s texting dirty to the bf while her best friend is having a breakdown. Instead of being there for her friend she’s reminiscing on the ‘best night of her life’ so that should show her true intentions. This is honestly terrifying. I don’t think it’s the immature mind of an 18 yr old, I think this is the work of a great manipulator and very selfish person. She obviously didn’t care who she had to hurt to get what she wanted. I think her side of this is the most infuriating because the pain of being betrayed by your boyfriend or being betrayed by your best friend is a world of different type of heart break. I really feel for this girl. I don’t know if this is a dramatic assumption but it seemed very clear to me. I wouldn’t be surprised if the friend tried to make a move on him again but this time just the two of them and they keep regularly sleeping together or even start dating. I just hope OP prepares herself to see them together just in case, we have all seen this scenario play out millions of times unfortunately.

Queen Soup

This could have all been avoided if the friend had just expressed her desires to have a threesome vocally. I don't know in what universe anyone who is a good friend would kiss your partner to initiate a threesome without first talking to you. I get that they're 18 and college freshman, but they are plenty old enough to had been taught about consent. My freshman year to attend a public 4-year state university you were required to take a mandatory course about consent, SA, and abusive relationships. I'm 22, and I remember first learning about consent in middle school. I think with the internet, talks about consent are also so much more mainstream than they may have been in the past. I think after the #MeToo movement which really gained traction when I was in high school, there was a big push for people to understand what consent really is and how important it is to relationships. I feel so awful for OP, I hope she can find healing after this. Both the boyfriend and best friend should have taken a second to gain consent, but were too driven by their desire for the other.

MadelineH

This is so wild idk if I could ever get that image out of my head… OP should definitely seek therapy to help her get over the initial trauma, I feel awful that she has to go through college with a beginning like that

Aurelia Torkington

As someone who has had many threesomes and been in three separate throuples (so many threes!!) that is 100% not how threesomes work. ESPECIALLY ones with friends. The way it should have started is the best friend kissing OP with the boyfriend watching and gettin steamy to the fact two girls are kissing, it doesn't make sense because OP isn't getting gratified by watching her best friend kiss her partner whereas the boyfriend would. That is, if they actually wanted to have a threesome lol this was obviously just a way for boyfriend and best friend to bone and OP being there was the only way to make it not cheating. I'm glad she cut them both out and is getting as far away from those relationships as possible, best friend has some weird posession and control issues with OP if she literally feels the need to screw her boyfriend in front of her.. therapy time for her