Alice Winterhold
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Art Anxiety
🕑 Added 2024-06-14 14:22:28 +0000 UTCI indulged myself a bit this week, kinda. I’m not exactly sure why or how but the creative furnace is burning hot inside me and I think the drawings I have forged in its fires are well above my usual capability. So, naturally, I spent hours upon hours making what can really only be described as an elaborate shit-post this week.
I envisioned this piece in its entirety before I started; like how the master artists of old were struck with visions of wonders they had to create in their dreams, this came to me similarly. A detailed and intricately drawn portrait, the best work I can manage, overshadowed by the confusing presence of the 90s BBC children’s television character “BRUM”, topped off with a crudely added message of perseverance in the face of adversity. I cannot explain why this happened as I do not know even myself.
And so, I had to make it happen. I put in more effort than I have ever put into a drawing before into this random shit that no-one asked for. I could have done something sexy or something funny, something beautiful or just otherwise accessible in any way, but instead I drew something which is really only funny to me because I made it and I shared it.
Still, I think I’ve crossed some kind of thresh-hold in terms of the quality of my drawing lately. I confess that I do usually show all my friend my works in progress. In the past he’s always been so encouraging; “OH WOW THAT’S CRAZY” or “OH GOSH You’re so good, this is great! I love ‘X’, ‘Y’ and ‘Z’”, etc. That’s been great, I like being told I’m doing a good job as I am still a little girl in my head and Daddy’s approval makes me feel happy. This time though, he was like, “Yeah. Good.” which isn’t good enough and made me feel like a bad girl doing bad job and now Daddy doesn’t love me anymore and the world is ENDING. This is, of course, ridiculous; I am an adult woman and shouldn’t need constant validation to do things I like doing. But is is a fact about myself that I have to overcome, it’s also a complete Segway from what the subject of this paragraph was supposed to be when I started writing it.
So with this drawing, I’m looking at it thinking that it’s the most impressive drawing I’ve ever done but the feedback I got was really muted and unenthusiastic. I feel like I’m going insane, is there some giant flaw I’m not seeing? Am I being gaslit? I ask again for clarification and it’s just, “It’s really good, I can’t see any problems with it” :\
What does this mean?!?!? Someone explain to me please
LOVE YOU XOXO
Comments
Richard
Love the sentiment and wish I had a tenth of the talent that you do..stupendous is the word...
Graham Lee
Looks great to me 😊
Andy Worsfold
Creativity comes from the heart. Your artwork is unique, as are you. Being creative is never easy, but so many people lack creativity. I couldn't draw or paint like this ever, and yet I love seeing art in many forms. My family thinks I'm mad for looking at early Disney animation as art, yet when you understand the history and development of the people that worked on these great films, they were very talented people. Your artistic talent, film making and sense of humour make you who you are. 🙂
Scotty Keister
There are so many good things in this piece: you’ve always been good with drapery but you nailed it here; the hair is wonderful, as are the eyes; the pose looks real, not cartoony; there is so much intention in cartoon Alice; it exudes energy.
Eric James
Her face looks like a car grill for sure…
DarthVagrant Saurette
You have my unconditional love. Safely from the other side of the pond. Respect and love
Brian Anderson
Yeah. This could be a poster. It IS the most advanced drawing I've seen of yours. It's more polished. It feels a lot more 3-Dimensional... much higher resolution with the "lighting" detail. Impressive!!
Andy White
Art is subjective, but to be subjective one must have emotions and feelings. And as emotional human beings, sometimes we just don't feel it. It could be a reflection of your friends' state of mind at the time rather than their opinion of your piece of creativity. They may offer an alternative or more forthcoming view on a separate occasion. For what it's worth,I like your art very much, and the humour speaks to me. Take care, Andy P.S. I've met Brum, there is photographic evidence somewhere.
David Verry
Haven’t seen a lot of your drawings so this is just my impression of this one. It shows extreme determination,her eyes are dead focused straight ahead,she’s not smiling,not frowning,just determined, I think she’s walking forward purposefully with determination,the left hand is almost in a clench. Another thought is “ so what?” If you don’t know what it means. Thanks for sharing Alice. Oh one other thing,nothing wrong with wanting validation.
Steven Davis
I love it: there's a strong statement of intent. Their reaction might be their off-day.
ALFRED STUDWELL
Very good cute art
Merrill Guice
I really like the hair and especially the way the fringe looked. I have no idea who brum is, but the sentiment came across fine. Some times, it just comes out. It is okay to love it: after all, it is you on that paper in all your uniqueness
