ShuraZero
patreon
Chapter 64: Debts, Idiots, and Ramen
🕑 Added 2025-10-17 01:57:12 +0000 UTCThe city of Tanzaku was an assault on the senses. Noisy, crowded, and it smelled like a strange mix of fried noodles, cheap booze, and desperation. The main streets were a river of people, with merchants shouting their wares and neon lights flashing even in broad daylight. But the city's true secrets, Kakashi had told them, were found in the alleys, behind unmarked doors, and in the smoke-filled basements.
"Alright, team," Kakashi said in a low voice as they gathered in a discreet alley. "You know the plan. We split up here. Kurenai, Hinata, you start in the inn district. Sakura, Shino, the eastern market has the highest concentration of clinics. Naruto, Kiba, you two get the gambling district."
Kiba pounded his chest, an arrogant smirk on his face. "Don't worry, sensei. This is a piece of cake. I'm an expert at acting like a tough guy."
Kakashi looked at him, his one visible eye curving into a smile. "Try not to get beaten up in the first five minutes, Kiba. Report anything. Don't act alone. I'll see you at dusk."
With that, the teams split up, disappearing into the bustling crowd.
Naruto and Kiba found themselves at the entrance to a narrow street, flanked by run-down buildings with faded red lanterns hanging from their windows. The sound of rolling dice and shouting men spilled from a doorway covered by a tattered curtain.
"Okay," Kiba said, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "Here we go. The first dive. Follow me and let me do the talking. You have to know how to blend in at these places."
Blend in? Naruto thought. We're wearing shinobi jackets and headbands.
Kiba took a deep breath, puffed out his chest, and walked into the establishment with an expression that was trying to be intimidating but only managed to make him look constipated. Naruto followed him, Akamaru peeking his head out of his jacket.
The place was small. A dozen rough-looking men sat around low tables, playing some dice game Naruto didn't recognize. Every head turned toward them the moment they walked in. The silence was instant.
Kiba approached the bar, where a man with a scar on his face was cleaning a glass with a dirty rag.
"Hey, you," Kiba said, trying to make his voice sound deeper. "I've heard… rumors."
The scarred man didn't even look up. "Oh yeah?"
"Yeah," Kiba continued. "Rumors about a… uh… a woman. A sucker."
Naruto facepalmed. A sucker. Great. Real subtle, Kiba.
The man at the bar finally looked up, his gaze one of pure boredom. "So what? This city is full of suckers. I'm one. You look like another one. What's the question?"
Kiba seemed to lose his train of thought. "Well, it's just… this is a… legendary sucker."
Naruto couldn't take it anymore. He pushed Kiba aside and leaned on the bar with one of his biggest, dumbest grins.
"Hey! What my friend is trying to say is that we're looking for the 'Legendary Sucker'! You know! A blonde woman, super strong, who loses all her money! Have you seen her? I bet she's been through here, because this place looks like the perfect spot to lose it all!"
The silence in the room turned hostile. The scarred man slowly put the glass down. Several of the players stood up.
"What did you say about my establishment, you little brat?" the bartender growled.
"I said it looks like a great place!" Naruto improvised, his smile never wavering. "An authentic place! With character! I'm sure she would love it!"
A burly man with a snake tattoo on his neck approached them. "We don't like Konoha ninja around here. Especially not ones who ask stupid questions. Get lost."
Kiba got into a defensive stance. "We're not leaving until you tell us what we want to know."
"I don't think you understand," the snake man said, cracking his knuckles.
Naruto sighed. First joint and we're already about to start a fight. A new record.
Just as the snake man was about to throw a punch, a tired, raspy voice came from a dark corner of the room.
"She was here last night."
Everyone turned. An old man, sitting alone at a table, was looking at them with clouded eyes.
"The woman you're looking for, the Sucker," the old man said. "She came, she gambled, and she lost. She lost a sum that could feed my family for a year. When she couldn't pay, the boss told her to get out. She… didn't take it well."
The old man pointed to a huge hole in the back wall, a crater of plaster and splintered wood in the perfect shape of a fist.
"She did that with a single punch. Then she left, laughing. Said she was going somewhere with better odds."
The snake man looked at the hole, then at Naruto and Kiba, and seemed to decide he wasn't getting paid enough to deal with people who made holes in walls.
"She headed toward the river district," he growled. "Now get lost."
Naruto and Kiba walked out of the place, blinking in the sunlight.
"See! I told you my plan would work!" Naruto said, slapping Kiba on the back.
"Your plan almost got us beaten up!" Kiba shot back. "It was my tough-guy act that intimidated them!"
Akamaru barked, a sound that was suspiciously like a laugh.
They spent the next few hours repeating the same pattern. Kiba would try to be stealthy and fail. Naruto would just walk in and ask loudly. And at every location, the story was the same.
In an underground mahjong parlor: "She came through here. Accused the dealer of cheating and flipped the table with one hand. The table was solid marble. She owes us the equivalent of three B-rank missions."
At a cockfighting den: "She bet all her money on the one-eyed rooster. She lost. Then, for some reason, she healed the losing rooster, which then proceeded to peck its opponent to near death. It ruined our business."
In a dive bar by the river: "The blonde… yeah, I remember her. She drank three bottles of our most expensive sake, said she'd pay with her winnings, and then lost it all playing cards with some travelers. She left through the back window. Left behind a debt and a broken chair."
They were moving through Tsunade's wake of financial and material destruction, always one step behind.
"This is useless," Kiba complained, slumping onto a bench. "It's like chasing a hurricane. By the time we get there, it's already passed and all that's left is the wreckage. I'm hungry."
Naruto was frustrated, too. And hungry. His stomach roared, a sound so loud that a nearby stray cat got spooked and ran off.
"Okay, you're right. We need a break," Naruto admitted. "And I need ramen. Desperately. My brain doesn't work without ramen."
"Fine. You go get your stupid soup. I'm going to try and sniff out her trail," Kiba said. "Maybe she left a scent… of debt and bad luck. Akamaru, what do you say?"
The dog sniffed the air and then looked at Kiba with an expression that clearly said, "it doesn't work that way."
"Meet back here in an hour," Naruto said, and he headed off in search of the world's only universal comfort: a good bowl of ramen.
He found a small, open-air stall on a less-traveled street, run by an old man and his wife. The smell was promising. He sat down at the counter and ordered his usual: miso ramen with extra pork, extra noodles, and extra everything.
As he waited, chin in his hands and feet dangling, he heard a commotion in the alley next door. Shouts. A man's voice, crude and threatening.
"No more excuses, blondie! Our boss's patience has a limit!"
"I told you, I'll pay you. I just need a little more time to… readjust my finances." That was a woman's voice. It sounded calm, almost bored, but with an edge of steel.
"Time's up. Either you pay what you owe right now, or we're going to break those pretty fingers, one by one, so you never touch a pair of dice again."
Great, Naruto thought with a sigh. Some thugs hassling a girl. Just what I needed. Although… that voice… doesn't sound like some ordinary girl who needs help. But whatever.
He stood up, leaving a few coins on the counter for the ramen that hadn't arrived yet.
Nobody messes with girls when I'm around! Especially not when I'm about to eat!
He entered the alley in his classic style: loud, unsubtle, and overly confident.
Three rough-looking men, armed with clubs and knives, were surrounding a woman. She was tall, with blonde hair tied in two low ponytails. She wore a green jacket over a gray, kimono-style blouse, and Naruto couldn't help but notice that… well, that she was very well-endowed.
"Hey, you guys!" he yelled, pointing an accusatory finger at them. "Leave her alone! It's three against one, that's an unfair fight! Don't you dare touch a hair on her head!"
The three debt collectors turned to look at him, first with surprise, then with amusement.
"And who are you, runt? Her little brother?" the leader, a guy with a face full of piercings, sneered.
The woman turned to look at him, too. Her expression was one of pure, absolute irritation.
And where did this clown come from? she thought. Just what I needed. Some brat with a hero complex dressed in fluorescent orange. That's the least stealthy outfit I've ever seen in my life.
But then her gaze fixed on his face. On the spiky blonde hair. On the defiant blue eyes. On the strange whisker marks on his cheeks. And something in her heart, something that had been dormant for decades, gave a painful lurch.
Wait a second… that face… Nawaki? No, wait... what is Minato's son doing here?
"Stay out of this, kid," the man with the piercings growled. "This is none of your business."
"Of course it's my business!" Naruto retorted, getting into a fighting stance. "Protecting people is a ninja's job!"
Before Naruto could throw a single punch, one of the collectors, the biggest one, got tired of talking and tried to grab Tsunade by the arm.
"That's enough. You're coming with us."
Tsunade didn't even look at him. With an expression of sheer boredom, as if she were shooing away a fly, she lifted a finger. Her index finger. And with a simple flick to the man's chest, she sent him away.
The man was sent flying.
He shot backward like a cannonball, crossed the five meters of the alley in a fraction of a second, and slammed into the back wall with a crash that shook the buildings. The brick wall cracked. The man slid to the ground, unconscious, leaving a human-shaped dent.
Naruto stood there with his jaw open, his fist half-raised.
The other two thugs looked at their fallen comrade, then at the woman, then at the finger she still had raised. The color drained from their faces. They dropped their weapons and ran out of the alley as if the devil himself was on their heels, screaming in terror.
Only Naruto, still in shock, and the blonde woman were left in the alley.
She slowly turned to Naruto, her expression a mix of irritation and a strange curiosity. She crossed her arms.
"I didn't need your help, brat. I can take care of myself, as you just saw."
Naruto slowly lowered his fist, his brain still trying to process what he had just witnessed.
"Whoa!" was all he could say. "That was amazing! You sent him flying with just one finger! One finger! You didn't even break a sweat! You're super strong, granny!"
The word "granny" landed. A visible twitch appeared in Tsunade's right eyelid. A vein started throbbing on her forehead. She was very, very close to sending him flying, too.
But then she looked at him again. She saw the genuine admiration in his blue eyes, an admiration so pure and unfiltered it was almost childish. And she saw the ghost of her brother again, the same goofy, life-filled smile. The twitch stopped. The vein stopped throbbing. The anger faded, replaced by a deep weariness.
She let out a long sigh.
"Look, I appreciate the effort, I guess," she said, her voice resigned. "And stop calling me granny. You're making me feel old."
"But you are old!" Naruto replied without thinking.
The twitch came back, stronger this time.
Breathe, Tsunade. He's just a stupid kid. A stupid kid who looks like Nawaki. Don't kill him. You'll regret it.
"Are you hungry?" she asked, changing the subject abruptly to avoid committing murder.
Naruto's eyes lit up instantly, his amazement at her strength replaced by a more primal need.
"Always! I'm starving! I was just about to eat the best ramen in the world!"
Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "The best in the world? That's a bold claim."
"It is! I'll prove it to you!"
"Fine," she said, starting to walk out of the alley. "I'll buy you some ramen. Consider it payment for you to stop following me and calling me granny."
"Deal!" Naruto exclaimed, trailing after her like an excited puppy.
They sat side by side at the small ramen stall, an awkward silence between them. Naruto devoured his bowl with an almost religious fervor. Tsunade watched him, stirring her own noodles without much appetite, a thoughtful expression on her face. He had no idea he was sitting across from the legendary Sannin his team was searching the entire country for.
They were just two strangers, a loud brat and a woman with too many ghosts, about to have a conversation that would change everything.
